Tamra Judge blew a gasket when Real Housewives of Orange County co-star, Kelly Dodd, dared breathe a word about her non-relationship with her oldest daughter, Sidney Barney.
Tamra lashed out in a blinding rage towards Kelly on the last episode of the show, during a cast trip to Ireland. Tamra blasted Kelly for “going there,” labeling her heartbreak “life changing pain.” Tamra didn’t mention that her pain was brought on by her own choices.
The following are the facts that led Tamra to the edge of the hyperventilating insanity viewers witnessed on Monday. Do they give out Emmys for reality TV?
FACT: Simon and Tamra Barney split and divorced in 2011. Simon fought for custody of their three children and an agreement was reached in 2015.
FACT: Simon accused Tamra of child abuse and neglect — and putting reality fame before motherhood. The judge dismissed the charges, citing a lack of evidence.
FACT: The custody battle left oldest daughter Sidney, who was 17 at the time, at a crossroads. Sidney decided that she no longer wanted to live with her mother. Tamra claimed that she had no idea why Sidney left her to go live with her father, full-time.
“She basically left home that day and two years later has not come back,” Tamra explained during the October 2015, Season 10 reunion, insisting she had “no idea where it was coming from.”
“I was trying to do everything I could do to try to get her back and I couldn’t understand why Sidney left,” she sobbed.
FACT: Tamra tried to force Sidney into therapy after her decision, but the judge denied her request, due to Sidney’s proximity to appropriate legal age to make her own decisions.
FACT: Tamra ignored her daughter’s request for privacy, and spilled her whole sad story on the Bravo reunion sofa. Sidney was the unwilling star of Tamra’s post-season 10 story.
“I don’t care anymore – he’s [Simon] not going to push me around, tell me what to do,” Tamra said. “I’ve kept quiet because of him for so long and now I’m speaking out.”
FACT: Shortly after Tamra’s public disclosure, Simon posted a quote from mental health expert and author Gail Meyers, hinting to Tamra as a ‘narcissist’ and an ’emotional vampire’.
FACT: Sidney posted a scathing message on her Facebook page—shattering any public misconceptions about why she chose to remain estranged from her mother.
On October 21, 2015, Sidney wrote in a Facebook post,
“I watched the reunion show last night and I am disappointed. I try not to talk about personal family matters, but I was made aware that my mother was talking about me and discussing our personal family matters on the show again. At this point I think it is necessary to tell the truth since she does not know how to tell the truth.”
“The reason I do not live with my mother is not because of my dad, it is because she is mentally/verbally abusive and not a mother to me. When I told my mother that I didn’t want to live with her anymore I asked only a few things from her. For the past two years I’ve been asking her to stop treating me badly, to stop doing embarrassing and talking about me on the show, and to not use my siblings and I as storylines. Clearly she hasn’t followed through with anything that would have made me go back to her house. After telling her this for two years in consoling, she still hasn’t recognized that these problems are between her and I and continues to make this about my father and her.”
“If she really wanted me back in her life she would have taken responsibility and changed two years ago when I told the first time what was causing our relationship to suffer. Obviously, I am just another storyline that feeds her fame and her wallet. Now you’re using Spencer as a storyline, I hope he realizes it before the damage is done.”
FACT: Tamra continues to speak out on social media about the pain of losing Sidney—her Bravo fame inviting more and more attention. Tamra continues to sign back on with Bravo, despite Sidney’s original request—that they work out their issues in private.
— Tamra Judge (@TamraBarney) October 11, 2016
@bevjfields I pray it never happens to her only child . As much as it hurts as a mom it's the children that are victims and life long pain
— Tamra Judge (@TamraBarney) October 13, 2016
According to Sidney, Tamra chose a trashy reality television career over her daughter. Sidney wanted no part of it, and chose to take a stand and save herself from the Bravo machine. Good for her.
So here they sit. That’s a fact.