Shahs of Sunset Recap: “One Wedding and a Dog Funeral” [Episode 10]

Posted on May 5 2015 - 7:10am by Wendy Owen

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Reza has Asa and MJ over to his pad for Champs, but there’s no food. What’s a heifer to eat? Ah. Leftovers. Meaning a warmed-over rehash of the Jessica and Mike dinner. The real news is that Reza and Adam have decided to not have Mike at his wedding, and that they’re going to Thailand for their honeymoon. Isn’t Thailand one of those countries where you get thrown in jail for life for littering? Ryan Seacrest couldn’t pay me enough to go there.

Screen Shot 2015-05-04 at 10.35.49 PM

GG and MJ are going to the doggie stuffer, and GG says she’s going to date some new guy, but I can’t really grasp the details since I’m so distracted by the Brit Mod 60’s hat MJ has stuck on her melon. Anyway, seems MJ has watched too many episodes of “Bates Motel” because she thinks this taxidermy idea is a good one. Maybe she should just make a hat out his carcass? The unlikely voice of reason is GG. She points out that’s it’s the stupidest idea since MJ bought that hat. MJ relents — to the incinerator!

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

No better match in the world than the Adam/Asa relationship. She’s his maid of honor, remember, and she’s as boring as he is, so they’re planning a snooze fest. On the other hand, Reza/MJ are planning a sex fest. Asa‘s planning a petting zoo. MJ‘s planning a petting penis zoo.

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

It’s Asifa‘s birthday, and time for her 70’s Bollywood theme party. Oh. Also time for Bobby to pull some “diamonds” out of some tissue paper and give them to Asifa. Where’s the box, bitch? Anyway, Mike and Jessica are not invited because GG is there, but at the doggie funeral, MJ wants the drama, so they are invited to that party.

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Bobby spends his time complaining to anyone and everyone about Asifa, so they’re on the right track to a second divorce. The cake comes, and Reza decides the best use for it, is to throw it around. It goes into Asifa‘s cleavage and all over Adam‘s face. And Mike and Jessica were not invited because they might cause a scene?

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

(Oh no! I’m watching in real time. What’s wrong with me? I know better than to watch in real time, and hear this: “Dear Poise, Women are using period pads for pee.” Kill me now, please.)

GG‘s going on her date. She’s going bowling. She bowls by spreading her legs, bending over, and rolling the ball down the lane. This is her mating ritual. This, and drinking. Ah to be free, white and over 31! She’s drinking Jack neat because “Whiskey makes you frisky.” Way to sell yourself, girl! “I like you’re style, by the way,” says the unknowing victim. Won’t be long before she’s pukin’ all over you if you play your cards right, boy! He’s too smart for that. He tells her he’s taking her home.

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

It’s time for the dead puppy party. It’s a catered affair. and everyone’s wearing dark colors and stupid hats. Seems to be the stupid hat episode. GG‘s not worried about seeing Mike. Especially since the second time was the charm and she passed her polygraph test that said she was drunk and no one had sex — just like on her bowling date. Mike shows up with his dog. No not Jessica, the other dog. MJ  makes a weird speech. Her moms looks at her like she’s crazy. She knows. She knows.

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

After the speech, everyone is invited to eat. Such a surprise. Food at a Persian get together? GG hugs MJ and squeezes her butt. Reza talks to Mike and squeezes his balls. GG tries to jump in there, but Mike shuts her down, then Reza and everyone else take GG‘s side. Reza drops the bomb: “Adam and I don’t want you at our wedding.” He goes on to explain he likes Mike okay, but Jessica can’t come no matter what.  And that’s all she wrote.

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Shahs of Sunset - Season 4

Next week, kids!

 

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I’m so fugly, the Dr slapped my mother when I was born.

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  • TartLemon

    I used to like this show, but it’s gone too far off the rails, IMO. While I refuse to defend Mike’s behavior, GG is just absolutely disgusting.

    Alone in this, I happen to like Asa.

    • pixntrix

      Agree with what you said, but I don’t like Asa.

      • HoyesMiGente

        Lol–agree except I don’t like Asa or Reza. I think they are nasty. And they try to set themselves up as moral arbiters! HA! Asa’s peace and love fakery is playing real thin. Reza is mean as he!! to Jessica. If I were Mike I’d be happy not to be going to that wedding. And none of them should be invited to his and Jessica’s. Don’t even get me started on GG. Hypocrite and stank nasty sly personality.

        • pixntrix

          You are spot on Hoyes…I really don’t like any of the characters on the show anymore but do read the recaps…makes my life seem so normal. Lol

          • HoyesMiGente

            Lol

  • pixntrix

    Thx for the recap Wendy it is better then watching the show.

    • Ilivehereandlikeit

      1000 ups!!!!

    • Nancy Krystofik

      I’ll second that! Very funny!

  • colleen

    Wendy, thank you for a wonderfully funny blog. Laughter starts in first paragraph, ” What’s a hefer to do?’
    Truth: The Poise Recycle your Period Pad commricisl is so stupid, I actually tweeted the company! No answer!

  • colleen

    Somebody please explain: why did Bobby kind of throw the diamond necklace at Asifa during hair and makeup? HOW can he afford a real diamond necklace of that size? Indeed, where was the expensive velvet lined box? Was this diamond necklace scene just a bunch of pretend bull shit?

    • HoyesMiGente

      Bobby and Asifa are so revolting. Both. Revolting.

  • misstc

    Somebody please explain to me this GG BS?!? For all the past seasons, she has always been drunk & out of control; last night on her first date with a gentleman, she got black out drunk! Yet, she has the balls to accuse Mike, (who is also a whore when drunk)? But I am not giving a pass to Jessica – she has become a monster. I guess Reza pinned her right by saying her head exploded with the engagement ring. Mike should RUN!

    • Yes, GG is a drunk hot mess but she’s not lying about Mike. He’s a real dirt bag and has been accused of cheating on Jessica by a few women. But I see your point about GG. Jessica is vile. Her attitude stinks and you can tell Mike is skeptical about her because he likes his friends.

  • Jessica

    Okay, can someone explain to me what dog died? Nowhere in this recap does it mention the dog’s name, or how it died. Which one was it, how did it die?

  • Jeannette Moore Wall

    See Reza and Asa would have more of my respect if BOTH hadn’t gone to Mike’s wedding. Did they not see her married the girl Reza is always calling a be’otch or white something or other? Look something may have happen but GG always, always add more to the story! If the girl is in so much pain for RA why the heck is she getting butt and boob implants? GG is not happy with herself period. Nobody in this loyal “Crew” is happy with themselves unless they have a target for their shade – this season it’s Mike. I think I’ll start watching again when it is Reza turn for the hotseat – right now I’ll read the recaps, thanks for sharing.