Real Housewives of New York Recap: “Battle of the Brunches” [Episode 3]

Posted on Apr 22 2015 - 7:46am by Dani-K

RHONY

We are still in the Hamptons on the Real Housewives of New York City. It’s the morning after the Bethenny/Ramona showdown of confusion. In Luann’s cozy cottage, Heather and Carole discuss the conundrum of too many brunches. Luann and Kristen join the conversation and cleverly dub it The Battle of the Brunches. The reasonable solution, according to the Countess, is to go to both brunches. Carole would prefer to stay behind with young chef, Adam, for a “cooking lesson” but will not get to do this.

RHONY

Carole asks Luann if Bethenny is a drama queen because apparently she’s never watched the show RHONY. Luann tells a story about an Hermes dress Ramona borrowed from Bethenny, but never returned it, which is kind of funny because Ramona didn’t speak to Sonja for 20 years over a sample sale dress.

The foursome arrive at Bethenny’s very cool Hampton house. Good news everyone! Bethenny’s not homeless anymore. Whew. What a relief. Inside her home it looks like a Skinnygirl party that would put any Tupperware party to shame. The kitchen and living rooms are filled with product placement. If you want a blender, be sure to leave your credit card number. Unfortunately, there are no toasters. Too bad, the ladies really wanted to get one for Sonja.

RHONY

Heather goes in for the kill right away with Bethenny, asking why she let Ramona get her upset. Bethenny says she wasn’t upset. Heather and Bethenny are obviously going to butt heads this season. They are too much alike. Kristen, who is still trying to find her voice, tries to put in her two cents, but Bethenny quickly cuts her off. The borrowed dress is mentioned, and Bethenny claims she’s not mad about that at all. Not at all. Not when Ramona said it fell out of the back of her car. And not when Ramona was photographed in it several months later. Bethenny thinks Ramona is “off the rails psycho-crazy” but she’s not mad about the dress, not at all.

RHONY

Ramona, Sonja, Tanya, and Dorinda-the guest of honor-arrive at a restaurant where they will brunch. Sounds kind of last minute to me, but what do I know. As they wait for the other ladies, Ramona regales them tales of Bethenny’s “verbal abuse” and nearly biting her head off while she tried to apologize. Ramona becomes agitated, nearly biting the head off of Sonja. Dorinda’s only focus is on her bloody mary.

RHONY

Back over at Bethenny’s, the ladies spill tea about Sonja. How she has no businesses, but claims to have many. Sonja’s delusion that she’s got her act together. But help is on the way. Bethenny is appointed leader of the “let’s get Sonja to focus” bandwagon. Good luck, Bethenny. Kristen’s husband failed miserably last season.

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Ramona and company are still waiting at the restaurant, drinking. Luann and her crew leave Bethenny’s house with blenders, cocktails and gifts. They call Ramona to let her know they are five minutes away, but Dorinda has to leave. She’s waited an hour and a half, but can’t wait any longer and must leave now. The ladies arrive just as Dorinda is walking out, so hugs and kisses all around. Sonja is confused and distressed that she wasn’t invited to Bethenny’s brunch, and she really seems to mean it. Perhaps Sonja had one too many beers from her purse. Sonja was invited. Ramona wasn’t invited. Get over it Sonja because Ramona already has.

RHONY

Back in the City, Dorinda is with her boyfriend having pizza, shrimp salad, and wine that only Dorinda is in love with. John kisses Dorinda and we learn that she doesn’t do PDA. John gets a business call and we learn that Dorinda does do WTF. She lets John have it and takes the phone and tells the caller that he’s super rude too. John apologizes for his friend. Guess we know who wears the dry-cleaned pants in this relationship.

We get our first look at Bethenny’s new Soho apartment that is under construction. It’s large, as far as NYC real estate goes, and will be wonderful, if only she could afford the apartment next door as well. The words fly out of her mouth, barking orders, threatening her contractor with castration. When they finally finish the place, it’s going to be gorgeous. Hopefully everyone will survive with parts intact.

Luann stops by to visit Ramona. A flashback is shown from Luann’s last visit, a botched ambush attempt to reunite Jill and Bethenny. We learn that Coco (the dog) is visiting Mario while he stays at his “friend’s” house. Really, Mario? Luann listens patiently, something Sonja can’t do, and tells Ramona to hold on to the good memories. Then she promptly tells Ramona that Mario is on all of the dating sites. Ramona is dating, too, and she’s filed for divorce. Wouldn’t it be totally interesting if Ramona’s divorce was finalized before Bethenny’s? A flashback is shown of the psychic in Monaco telling Ramona that Mario was cheating, to drive the humiliation point all the home.

RHONY

During the interstitial, the funniest, saddest, cringe-worthy moment occurs to Dorinda. She’s meeting friends for dinner. She’s wearing a great dress (that I hope is hers). She’s the first to arrive. After being seated, she motions to an African-American man. When he gets to her table, she asks if he’ll check her coat. I wish he would have said yes and taken her coat. Turns out, he didn’t work there, but was a patron just like her. #awkward

RHONY

Heather, Luann, and Bethenny meet for lunch. Heather is non-stop talking about being on television in a mock shark tank format that listens to concepts but doesn’t give money but is still important, because she is doing great and she’s so relevant. Heather asks about the text from Ramona to Bethenny because that was her idea. Then Heather and Bethenny order the most complicated, but different, margaritas ever. I swear these two were separated at birth. When Heather brings up Ramona again, Bethenny shuts her down and tells her, “Nothing you say is interesting.”

RHONY

Luann has planned a night out with all of the single ladies. Sorry Kristen, Dorinda, and Heather, you’re not invited. They meet at a boutique pick up joint. When Luann enters, she is with satchels of gold, ex housewife, Kelly Bensimon, who Luann “just happened to run into.” The rest of the ladies arrive one by one. When Bethenny shows up, she sees Kelly, but goes to the bar and surrounds herself with men. Two young men go over to the ladies table and Sonja pounces on the youngsters like a cat in the jungle. Luann makes her way to the bar and she and Bethenny discuss the difference between intentionally and randomly.

RHONY

The ladies dance the night away. Sonja takes vodka shots with her German boytoy. Bethenny and Kelly get along. Men hit on Ramona. And Dorinda’s boyfriend shows up. Wait? What’s he doing here? Sonja slurringly asks John why he’s there without Dorinda. John says he’s there for a “business meeting.” Yes. A dry-cleaning business meeting late at night at the bar/meat-market. Dorinda, this is what we call a red flag, girl.

 

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I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run. For more information, please visit me at:
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  • WaWaWaWHAT!

    That pic of Bethenny is ON POINT…girl is a mile a minute speaker…needs to take more breath’s while she speaks…and won’t STFU!!!! Her ‘Really, Kenny Benismon, that’s so 2000 and who cares’ was PRICELESS!!!

    Does Kelly age? Maybe we should be on the gummy bear, one day I’m a vegetarian…the next I’m not diet!!

    • MidwestMiddie

      While Bethenny looks freaky scary, Kelly looks Fantastic!!!!

  • WaWaWaWHAT!

    Was Kristen on the show last night? LOL She threw out a line here and there to maybe, hopefully make herself relevant on this show…

    • Chloe

      She wasn’t missed. I hope this is her last season.

    • Dani-K

      IMHO – 8 women are too many. I think, as of right now, Kristen’s head is on the chopping block. But we’ll see. Maybe she’ll surprise us all.

      • WaWaWaWHAT!

        I think so too…I bet Bravo edited her out of a lot…she literally have NOTHING interesting going on or about her!

  • WaWaWaWHAT!

    Dorinda flagging down the black guy in the restaurant so he could check her coat…GIRL BYE! You SHOULD be embarrassed…

    It would have been more funny if the guy took her coat…then she asked the waiter to go ‘fetch’ her coat from coat check…response: ‘Ma’am we don’t have a coat check’ o.0

    • Bad Barbie

      That was type racist of her… socialist, the least.

      • Chloe

        That scene looked bad but I’m sure it was an honest mistake. She looked mortified.

        • Bad Barbie

          If her brain automatically identifies a black person for being staff, she has issues.

    • itsjustme

      Yes, that scene was horrifying, However, I do think I am going to like Dorinda. Seeing the previews from next with with her and John, well any woman who will stop a man in his tracks the way she did, that is a woman I can appreciate…lol

      • WaWaWaWHAT!

        Oh yea, I don’t hate her after that…just made me side eye her

    • Dani-K

      Totally!

  • Margroc

    Good Lord, we are only 2 or 3 episodes in and I’ve already had my fill of Bethany. She’s a self important little skinny bitch. Sorry to those who like her, but she’s rude and takes everything way too seriously.

    • Chloe

      Definitely a talk-a-holic and know-it-all.

      • MidwestMiddie

        She doesn’t want to come on the show as the Failure she
        truly is …….. She’ll NEVER ADMIT that
        Losing her Talk Show was her fault.
        Losing her marriage was her fault.
        Losing 95% of her fans was her fault.
        Etc.

        Without her friend Bravo Andy’s influence, Bethenny wouldn’t be on television.
        Andy screwed up. I think RHNYC will lose viewers with Bethenny on
        the show.

        • carefreemama

          ITA Midwest….if all this is going to turn into Bethanny babble and cougar catch’um then I’m gone. Andy should bring them on their own show and call it “BangerBabes”….this has nothing to do with housewives. Bethanny and NaNa need to fall into a boiling cauldron and come out with a bit of humble pie….IMO.

      • Dani-K

        Definitely Chloe! It will be interesting come reunion time if everyone has had their fill of her. Sonja might be a close second.

    • Ilivehereandlikeit

      That voice…the stuff of nightmares…

      She IS rude as all get out and I just don’t want to deal with that on a TV show. Real life is rude enough, but at least I can talk back in real life. TV show? I can turn off so I guess that *is* talking back? Still, up your game Bravo, this woman really isn’t all that.

      Agree Margroc, Bethany’s presence on this show detracts rather than adds for me.

  • Chloe

    Bethenny is like neurotic dog that barks 100 constantly. She needs turn off switch. She is exhausting.

    • Bad Barbie

      I totally agree. There is only 5 minutes I can take of her.

      • Chloe

        Omg – yes and I wonder if she’s pushing her Skinny Girl brand enough…good grief.

        • MidwestMiddie

          Last year Andy made a comment that cast members would no longer be able to hawk their products on the show. They could still promote them on their blogs.
          But, but, but ……..Bethenny is soooo special! Gag!!

          • I bet greedy Bethenny stipulated in her contract she could shamelessly hawk her wares.

          • MidwestMiddie

            Totally!!!
            And I’ll bet away from the film crew, the other women were laughing
            at Bethenny’s Skinny Girl Kiosk. No Class! Tacky!!
            Her decor made her look desperate. Guess her Skinny Girl
            products are not selling. Hope so ……….

          • Fritz the. At

            Doc, I am stalking you to say hi.

          • Hi Fritz. I haven’t been feeling too well so thank you for reaching out. I appreciate it. How are you doing?

          • side of Sour Cream

            That would explain the instant and intense dislike from some of the cast. I’m gonna watch for True Renewal, Yummy Tummy, Ramona Pinot, LuAnn’s housewares, etc. this season. See if Beth is the ONLY one allowed to freely hawk her wares.

          • Ilivehereandlikeit

            Consider the source…

          • MidwestMiddie

            I think Andy was serious when he made the comment because
            viewers had complained about the cast members “product placements” being seen in every frame of film.
            However, I’m sure Bethenny demanded her products get free advertising and be shown on every episode of the RHNYC.

          • Ilivehereandlikeit

            Andy strikes me as someone that will turn on a dime. He probably did say no, no more product placements and within 2 seconds said “sure!” when the first person floated another idea in front of him. He, imo, doesn’t come off as very committed to anything…well except himself -that guy, he LOVES!!! 😉

          • MidwestMiddie

            LOL

    • carefreemama

      Didn’t she tell Ramona to “just breathe, just breathe” several seasons ago? Heal thyself doctor. My heart races every time she opens her mouth. I’m surprised she doesn’t begin frothing!!

    • Ilivehereandlikeit

      ‘Exhausting’. Perfect description!!!!!

  • carefreemama

    I am dubbing Bethany the “BITCHTATOR”. My heavens, she controls (dictates) every situation with addict behavior, over talking, screaming motions, and know it-all attitude. She’s the “bitchtator from hell”!!!! Please take her away….one season is enough!!!

    • Dani-K

      Good one, Carefree!

    • Love “BITCHTATOR.” Kudos!

  • itsjustme

    Ya know, I really had wanted to relike Bethenny. After listening to her tonight and see that her hamptons home was a skinny girl infomercial I had enough. This episode just gave me an “ick” feeling Watching all of these women in that meat market was just….ICK to me. I’m around their age and single and there is no way I could, under any circumstances bring myself the behave like a 20 yr old in a club. I guess maybe that is why I will remain single the rest of my days I guess..lol

    • Dani-K

      I’m all for having a good time, and that’s what I want to see instead of the women arguing, but I was embarrassed for Sonja.

  • side of Sour Cream

    Thought it was funny that at Bethenny’s product placement brunch they all got to choose a parting gift, and Carole took the blender because she thought it was probably “the most expensive item”. LOL, that cracked me up.
    Would have liked to see more of Beth’s new house, and the gossip going on there, than watch Ramonja gripe on and on in some random restaurant. Although it did allow the promises-to-be-interesting Dorinda to make the astute comment about not wanting to listen to “two old bitches bitching” or something to that effect.

    Great recap Dani-K!

    • MidwestMiddie

      Wasn’t there one more offer on the table besides sitting in a restaurant
      or filming Bethenny’s SG Informercial?
      Didn’t Luann mention heading to a place by boat?
      Now that would have been my choice!!!
      : )

      • Dani-K

        One thing I noticed Middie, all these women do is go to restaurants, but are they even eating? A boat ride would have been a nice change.

    • Dani-K

      Thanks! Dorinda cracks me up. She’s a nice addition. But once upon a time I said that same thing about Sonja.

    • MidwestMiddie

      My Guess – Carole probably took the blender to make cocktails.
      Remember she really doesn’t have a kitchen any longer.
      : )

  • johncnnj

    With regard to Dorinda calling on that man to check her coat – I completely saw it. I, too, thought he was staff. And, no… it has nothing to do with his skin colour – he was wearing a shirt and a tie – no jacket and he did seem like he worked there. Then again… I’m not too keen on figuring things out – having once told a man I loved his metalic bow tie only to realise it was something he had over his tracheotomy.

    And yeah… enough Bethenny. I ABHOR her and it’s only been a couple of episodes.

    • Dani-K

      That is a funny story, john! Thanks for sharing.

    • side of Sour Cream

      I once asked a guy in a theater “how did you get these great seats with all the leg room?” and then noticed he was sitting in a wheel chair. :-

    • Ilivehereandlikeit

      I asked a general in full dress uniform at an Officer’s Club (I was a guest) to help park my car. I thought he was a valet/doorman??? I know, I accept full idiot title for that one -lol.

      He was good natured however and never missed a beat, offered to take my keys and DID park my car – haha! Awesome guy!! I found out later that evening he was being honored at an event there. True story!!!

      • Rochelle Barozzi

        LOL! That is awesome!

      • Dani-K

        So funny!

    • Rochelle Barozzi

      Bethany is why I am not watching it this season. I just cannot stand her either.

  • Birdie

    Bethenny needs to chill..she makes me anxious. She needs to take a pill, do something rather than run around like she’s on speed, eyes darting around looking, looking, looking… for some personality trait, some wrong word, expression, flinch, nuance to rip to shreds. UGH.

  • Elizabeth Fisher

    Would someone please wake me when the Skinnygirl commercial is over?

    • MidwestMiddie

      Well Said!!!
      : )

    • morrison

      so true , she’s making everyone vomit already

  • Rochelle Barozzi

    After reading all of your comments, it just reinforces why I am not watching this season. Great recap Dani-K!

    • Dani-K

      Thanks Rochelle! I hope you’ll keep reading!

  • morrison

    so funny

  • Ilivehereandlikeit

    I watched this episode last night when it was re-run. That scene in the bar just turned my stomach. First of all there are cameras there so these guys were obviously there for one reason and it was NOT the “girls.”

    Next: OMG Sonja???? Drooling over that model guy..I felt like I’d accidentally tuned into an episode of “To Catch A Predator.” She’s very creepy with that panting over men schickt.

    Haven’t watched this series much but after last night, I see the recaps are far FAR better than anything Bravo puts out there! Thanks for sparing me the pain and suffering Dani-K!!!! 🙂