#SisterWives Recap: “First a Verdict, Then a Lawyer” [Episode 15]

Posted on Feb 16 2015 - 12:03pm by BeachSpin

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Sister Wives” begins by reminding us that the anthropology students are still tagging along with the Browns, and we relive the horror of Garrison and Gabriel’s parking lot scuffle.  Gabriel is caught lying, is banned from the family poker event, and it’s treated like an epic family tragedy. The students, Antoinette and Richard convene on a bedroom floor, and after discussing the deep psychological ramifications of a kid lying to save his butt, they decide that the Browns sex life (EW!) needs to be explored, along with the understandable jealously that accompanies bed hopping around a cul de sac.

We hear of some vague toddler dental surgery that young Solomon needs that will require general anesthesia, which is causing stress for Kody and Robyn, and making me wonder what in the world could be wrong with brand new baby teeth that would require such a thing. This episode is going in every direction, like a bunch of mismatched puzzle pieces. The students sit down with Christine and her live-in mom, where Annie shares about her harrowing decision to leave polygamy. She and Christine speak about the painful divorce, and the resulting separation between the two of them, and the students ooohh and aahh as they analyze the oh so intense and insightful dialogue. Chatting with Meri comes next, where they discuss the strained relationship between she and Janelle.  The pair can barely stand each other, but function pretty well as a successful TV family, and Meri informs us that the window of non-hatred had passed long ago, and a good relationship is pretty darn hopeless.

Richard and Antoinette begin to figure out that Robyn is elbowing Meri out of first place, and nail Kody for favoring his son with his soon to be only legit wife. Robyn is irritated, and responds by claiming that Sol has toddler teeth problems and likes hugs more than all the other kids. The family gathers for poker, and the students are thrilled that Kody has cut loose.  I am surprised  that Gabriel isn’t relieved that he dodged the bullet of hanging with Kody on ponytail night. Mariah comes home to visit, and shares her dreams of being part of a harem just like her tossed out mommy. Kody wants Mariah to take her time, and Meri wishes that she had done the same, when Kody remarks that a man needs to be sure that she marries someone that he doesn’t want to toss out for a newer model in 20 years. Christine has a hissy fit, because Kody is second guessing how they got together, and probably that her #1 wife audition was passed over for Robyn’s.

The adults decide to gather to discuss the touchy stuff, and Kody is nailed for connecting with the boys and not the girls. Kody agrees that he’s lame and doesn’t know why.  The question about same sex relationships is approached, and the obvious earlier agreed upon response is spit out, while Kody keeps asserting that as long as they wait until they’re married, it’s all cool.  The students agree that the most shocking thing about the Browns is that apart from his hair, Kody doesn’t make them nauseous. The dubbing of Robyn as the sex wife must be on the cutting room floor, because it is never mentioned. We watch Janelle plunk a real estate sign in front of a house, and learn that she always wants to earn an income, and that she and Meri could use massive amounts of therapy. Antoinette counsels Janelle to get off her butt and accept that old dead olive branch, and Janelle agrees to make it her New Year’s resolution, right after ‘get the heck outta here.’   The crowd eats together, and Kody believes solid friendships have been made.  

Richard receives a pan of beans, and Antoinette a hideous Sister Wives Closet necklace as a farewell gifts, with Richard clearly scoring the better gift.  The students meet with their professor about their time on Brown Street, and answer “OH NO!” all too quickly when asked if there’s a favorite wife.  They evade the question about how Kodes doles out “affection”,  Antoinette decides that she is all about the sister wifery, and Richard thinks that she should apply as Kody’s fifth.  Richard bids farewell with sanctimonious,  judgmental statement towards all of us who don’t agree with the Browns way of life, as a segue to the promised ‘REAL STORY’ about the divorce.  That ‘real story’ had better be short, because we are in the last two minutes of the show.  Meri eyes dart around shiftily and can barely blurt out that she is seeing a lawyer, and we watch while she chokes out her request to the attorney.  We find out more in two weeks….plenty of time for more TLC editing magic.  In the scenes for next time, the new legal couple pull out their acting chops, as we watch Kody furrow his brow, and Robyn blink like a bewildered deer, while Meri  avoids eye contact as she stammers out the shocking news. PLEASE TLC!  Give me something I can believe!

This show has officially crossed over into BS Town, and the Browns have thrown ‘reality’ into the community cul de sac dumpster.  Anyone can look back at Meri’s Twitter feed since Kodes married Robyn in early December, and see that she is not behind this sneaky maneuver.  Get ready for more manipulated nonsense in two weeks as TLC and the Browns continue to try and save a show that has jumped the shark and is sinking fast!  What spin do you think is coming?

 

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I am a coastal girl who loves the outdoors, and writing about the sneaky and silly side of reality TV. My bio is short, but my snark is endless, and I love writing for the sharpest posters in the world. Follow me on Facebook

  • Just Me

    Great little editorial! I couldn’t have said it better myself.

    • BeachSpin

      Thanks Just Me!!

  • ♥♥♥ Tigerlily ·.¸¸.·*¨·.·.¸¸.

    OMG! I can’t stand these people. Do not one of you believe you have any worth or value that you’d all accept this crappola?

    I swear, I think if I ever saw one of them in person? I’d just have to jump them & slap them all upside the head for being such dumbazzes!

    http://p.fod4.com/p/media/87b82bdcd4/dU5uwWV3RqucQ7InODGZ_Third%20Hand%20Slap.gif
    https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-xsmSnynIQH4/Usj-NAdw4NI/AAAAAAAABDY/vgsQSOn_u6k/w426-h300/tumblr_lxg4uqzT4i1qbazgio1_250.gif

    • Jennymckitty

      I feel for them. They grew up in this life…being taught that these beliefs were right…isolated from anyone who didn’t share their beliefs. Meri & Kody & Janelle married at about the age when people start to question the beliefs there parents passed on to them. They started having a gaggle of kids, got caught up in surviving parenthood & it is just now that, especially Meri, can question if they still believe in the idea.

      • ♥♥♥ Tigerlily ·.¸¸.·*¨·.·.¸¸.

        I totally see your point Jenny & I agree to a point. But… it’s 2015. Time to gtfu & get a clue. You know?

        • Jennymckitty

          I think that a few of them are. However, they stand to lose a lot. Christine can’t afford to live on her own & she saw first hand what happened to her mom when she divorced & left.

          • ♥♥♥ Tigerlily ·.¸¸.·*¨·.·.¸¸.

            It’s sad to watch. It bothers me. & to have all these children see it? & maybe think that it’s okay? Just sad.

          • chacha1

            Christine and her mother will both collect welfare and food stamps and Christine can line dance while mom makes purses so they can keep the house

      • chacha1

        I respectfully disagree, Janelle was being abused from day one by Meri and Kody did nothing about it, Janelle left and then came back, she made her choice and she chose misery and sharing a dirty peen with the other hags… no one forced her

      • OhSnarkyMe

        Janelle wasn’t raised in this lifestyle/cult. She was raised mainstream lds and chose this cult on her own. She was also in a monogamist marriage to Meri’s brother. Janelle is in that mess 100% by choice and will never leave.

        Meri and Christine were indoctrinated their entire lives. Due to that, they probably also won’t leave. Kody was raised mainstream LDS and chose this cult as an adult as well. He’ll never leave because he thinks he’s a god.

  • Yolie

    I truly hope that this shows pure love between them, and it’s not staged to hide pain. We don’t know this family. We don’t know these people except through this show and yet I think 85% of us feel a huge amount of protection towards Meri.

    • Birdie

      But the whole premise of the show is that they are vulnerable and honest…that is their claim. They are the ones saying that we are getting to know the real them. If that isn’t true (obviously), then I don’t feel sorry for any of them.

    • chacha1

      Meri is nothing but a miserable abusive mean hag (Kodys twin) and has proven it thru her hissy fits

  • Dani-K

    What a great job of recapping their convoluted story line! I wonder why TLC is not abandoning ship like the did with Honey BooBoo and Kate Plus 8? Something is rotten in polygamy town.

    • BeachSpin

      Thanks Dani! TLC is spinning their wheels, in full cahoots with the Browns.

  • chacha1

    …Regarding the Anthropologists and the feeling I have that this was all set-up by Logan who goes to school with them or TLC, after watching it again Antoinette asked Robyn if Kody was more attentive to Sol than the others and Miss Lying Know It All Robyn said “he was only more attentive to Solomon because he had surgery” Then in thier summation of their 3 day stay with the hosebags who are committing adultery RICHARD said that we (on the message boards) who do not approve of their lifestyle and bash them for it are all “OFF THEIR ROCKERS” and that they are a loving and close family, yes that is what Richard called us that have a low opinion of abusive Kody and his miserable sister slugs …. and yes, ANtoinette said she would like to be a sister wife but not with Kody …. hmmmm maybe Logan you think?
    Oh Antoinette you know that not only has Janelle been miserable with Meri for 18 years, she is NOW going to counseling for her issues with Meri ….. HA !!!! … yeah okay !!!!

    • Birdie

      Oh YES…those students were condescending twits…and OMG Antoinette with Logan?? That would be insane.

      • chacha1

        but you never know Birdie, Antoinette said she wants to be a sister wife and Logan has not ruled the plural thing out … he is just like his arrogant father ….. and they do go to the same college …..

      • chacha1

        Logan and Antoinette deserve each other, Logan is turning into an asshat just like his father

  • chacha1

    does anyone have information about a domestic dispute between Kody and Janelle in October where the police were called?

  • chacha1

    why would Kody swear his mother to secrecy about the real reason for the divorce? And they are hoping for another few seasons of sister slugs and that is why you see Meri smiling in a birthday picture with Kody after his marriage to Robyn …. we have all been punked by the Anthropoligists and by the Browns …. they laugh all the way thru the cul de sac to the bank

    • BeachSpin

      PUNKED..yes! The whole thing felt like a set up and the hard questions were never addressed…all fluff, and NO negative conclusions reached after visiting several miserable homes? OK.

    • All About The Tea

      Check your email.

      • chacha1

        Okay and thank you 🙂

    • OhSnarkyMe

      It was bizarre. Rather than say “Well, I will let my son comment on this, it’s not really my place” she says she was “sworn to secrecy”? That’s just shady.

      I doubt the Browns will ever fess up to the real reason.

  • chacha1

    I keep thinking about the “talk” Skrody and Christine had with Mykelties boyfriend about hormones in the mouth and kissing …. after that the boy broke up with her and didn’t even talk to her until the graduation because he was probably forced to, can you imagine the teasing that Mykeltie got and then on camera she said that what her father said was right …. now you know that was a bald faced lie from Mykeltie

  • Rebecca

    I guess I’m confused- not unusual after watching these people for an hour – but didn’t Kody say somewhere that he was divorcing Meri, and marrying Sobbin Robyn in order to be able to legally protect her kids? I’m not sure I believe it, and I’m just as sure that Sobbin has been Kody’s favorite piece since he met her. Kody’s favoritism of Sobbin is so blatant, and she never shuts up during the interview parts of the show. After only being part of the family for about 5 years, Sobbin knows more than anyone else, is an authority on everything polygamist, knows all the kids better than their birth moms, and understands gross Kody better than the women who have put up with him for 20 years. Becoming Kody’s only legal wife is what Sobbin has hoped and dreamed of; she has done everything possible to usurp Meri, disregard Janelle, and uncover all of Christine’s many insecurities. Sobbin has always seen herself as Wife # 1, and finally having a legitimate (in her opinion) reason to push for it, has only reinforced her already oversized ego. Likewise, Kody has wanted to make Sobbin his # 1 – she’s younger, thinner and feeds his enormous ego a steady diet of “you’re awesome Kodes” that is repulsive to watch. This show is like a car wreck. It’s disgusting, and scary, but it’s hard to look away. They’re all nuts.

    • chacha1

      we will never know the truth from these lying hosebags because Kody swore his mother to secrecy on the real reason. That is what his mother said

    • Birdie

      PREACH!!

  • chacha1

    Maybe Meri will become an anthropologist just like Logan’s girlfriend Antoinette (possibly)….. I guess you can make money by doing nothing but laying around other peoples homes and making shit up, but hey Antoinette wants to be a sister wife because her education gives her and that other imposter Richard the right to say that the lifestyle is happy and everyone is singing kumbuya while toasting marshmallows and we the bloggers are off our rockers