Saturday Funnies: Brandi Glanville Tries To “Fit In” On Other Housewives Shows!

Posted on Jan 24 2015 - 1:40am by Trixie Felonabulous

brandi-glanville-drunk1

Brandi Tries To ‘Fit In’ On Other RHW Shows!
(But Doesn’t Quite Make It)

 

Kyle actually thought Brandi would make it in the big city.
Street performing.

Go Kray Kray

 

Over on The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa Giudice wasn’t too happy with Brandi throwing
around the Felonellini.
don't throw it

 

Aviva tried to give Brandi a leg up over in Atlanta, but…
RHONY

 

Seems like Porsha had other tactics to use!
porsha n brandi gif

 

All was going well over at Real Housewives of New York till
2425836vG1qpFzn-rotated

 

…Ramona showed Brandi HOW to throw a wine glass, not just the wine!
ramona-gif

 

Brandi thought with all the bruises she acquired she’d go over
to Married To Medicine.
Guess someone gave her a ‘whopping’ dose of medicine!

M2M fight-gif

 

Guess Brandi will have to ‘tuff it out’ over at
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills…
bruised

 

*Content for comedic purposes only. Not intended to be taken seriously*
 

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About the Author

Convicted Felon * Thief * Liar * Felonlicious * Change of address coming soon–Alderson Federal Prison–prisoner # tbd (to be determined)

  • MinkalaniMInkeshiaLatawandaJoh

    Brandi you are such an inzpiration!!! Someday I want to be just like her!!!! She rents a home, she’s on tv, she drives a range rover, she HAS IT ALLLL SHE IS FABULIZZZZ!!!!!!

  • Drunk bish! Ramona would kick her ass. LMAOOO!!!

  • Regina George

    Brandy is the fugliest skank of them all! Ugggh! Get rid of her! Whaterever im not watching this show, I’m gonna get some cheese fries.

    • twifan2

      OH! Chili Cheesy Fries! 🙂

  • Marsbars09

    Great blog! I think Brandi’s trailer trash behind would fit in great with the OC wives.

  • Trippinhhard

    Too funny—but old skanky ass Brandi is not wanted on any HWS show…
    They need a show called ” the skanky HWS show” all of them the same..lol
    Let’s see how well she behaves with low class skanks like herself.. Awww the fights, titties hanging out, g sting showing, drunk, humping on each other R whoever they see… My eyes would not watch, but I would read the recaps..

  • Raine Woman

    “Aviva tried to give Brandi a leg up over in Atlanta…” Twi, that’s your BEST line EVER! LOLOL

  • twifan2

    It’s Saturday in the neighborhood! 🙂
    Has anyone heard about Jeanna K coming back to the OC?! :/
    That’ll leave Brando out! 🙂

    • Raine Woman

      *raises hand* Yup, heard/read same thing. Recycled Housewives of OC?

      • twifan2

        I was thinkin’ more on the lines of Vickie needs a ‘friend'(allie). TamTrash is really going to try & bring the stankiness this coming season. aka Brandi style. :/

        • Raine Woman

          I fondly remember looking forward to the new seasons. Not so much anymore. I need something new!

      • twifan2

        RAINE!!! You seen the new music video from 3KT?
        :/

        • Raine Woman

          I’m ashamed and embarrassed to say I did watch. I got about a minute, 20 seconds in and I had to bail for my own sanity. How far did you get?

          • twifan2

            Ok, it took me 3 tries before I could even get 2 thirds in! :/
            Can you say ‘wasted time & effort’ tribute to mom?! UGH!!!!

          • Raine Woman

            Wasted time & effort tribute to mom! Well look at that…..I can!

          • twifan2

            It’s not very good-the music. :/
            I’m going to try & finish watching it after I have a whole box of Wally World’s finest! 🙂
            What you think of what you saw? I kept waiting in the first minute for it to get better….NOPE!

          • Raine Woman

            LMAO Exactly! I waited 1 minute and 19 whole seconds too long thinking it would get better.

            Nothing about it was good. But the worst thing of all, IMO, is thinking about all the adults who were involved in producing or “distributing” this disturbingly cheap-ass ploy for continued celebrity (even at the expense of this talentless kid) thinking it’s appropriate in way. It’s seriously disturbing.

          • twifan2

            AND she’s not 13 any more! :/

          • Raine Woman

            Giudice Math!

          • twifan2

            I almost want to say Gia didn’t use autotune. Her voice is scratchy, off tune at times. :/

          • Raine Woman

            I think the opposite….it’s autotuned to death. The scary part? That’s the best the producers could do with what they were given.

          • twifan2

            The comments on there are better than the lyrics! 🙂

          • Raine Woman

            There are comments? Yay! Where?

          • twifan2

            Below the video.
            On YT

          • Raine Woman

            I saw it over on the “Teressa is doing Grrrrrrrr-eat! in prison” story. Someone posted the video.

            I’ll go to YT and check there.

          • twifan2

            What gets me is the
            ‘you can tweet about it’ <—Yep we can. BUT we don't make a bad music video about it.

          • Raine Woman

            Wow, you paid attention. That must be a lyric but I don’t want to watch it again to have to get the context……DAMN YOU, twi….brb

          • twifan2

            I wanted to to see after 2 glasses of wine if I could be deaf. Nope!
            Ok, I’m going to try & finish the video. May God have mercy on me! 🙂

          • Raine Woman

            Abandon Ship! Save Yourself!!! It’s not worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

          • twifan2

            Too late! 🙁
            Chats went & hid under the bed covers. Addie’s howling like mad! Chloe is running around in circles!
            My hearing & vision has been impaired now! ≧◉_◉≦

          • Raine Woman

            I can’t do it, I can’t go past 1:36. I got the “tweet about it” lyric, that’s where I was bailing out the first time. But did I just hear something about being a Queen right before I bailed the second time? I won’t try a third time. You can’t make me!!!

            It’s great if this is how Gia chooses to express her feelings about her situation. There’s just no reason on Earth it should be promoted publically.

          • twifan2

            She does say ‘Queen’. That’s just narcissistic- oh! JUST like her mom! :/
            Guess she thinks she can make $$$ off the fambly’s ‘notoriety’. The kid doesn’t stand a chance with those ‘values’!

          • Raine Woman

            Before I suit up and try to find my driveway, let me leave you with this “Making Snow Cones out of Fellonlinni since 2013” thoughts….

            Gia’s song writing skills have improved tremendously since “Milania…first you were one, then two, then three, etc…”

          • twifan2

            The lyrics were a collaboration of Gia & Keresse Dorcely.
            Wonder if it was an 20-80 ‘collaboration’? :/

            What happened to your driveway?

          • Raine Woman

            Oh, a “collaboration”…got it. 😉 Like mother, like daughter.
            Nothing, the driveway is fine. It’s just buried under a whole bunch of snow.

          • twifan2

            A ways to a mean—>$$$!

            YEAH! No snow here today. Ask me Tuesday tho. 🙁

          • Raine Woman

            It’s hitting here again Monday so I’ll let you know what you expect. Ugh, this is gonna suck. Catch ya later, twi!

          • twifan2

            Laters Raine! 🙂
            Have a good one! 🙂

          • twifan2
          • Raine Woman

            HA!!! Do you have one of those for lip-synching and/or acting, as well?

          • twifan2
          • Raine Woman

            That’ll work! LOL

          • twifan2

            Try this video! 😀

          • twifan2

            Think Bill C & Jeffery E are going to buy copies of the video? :/

          • twifan2
          • HAHAHAHAHA!!!

          • Rochelle Barozzi

            ROFL!!!

          • ♥♥♥ Tigerlily ·.¸¸.·*¨·.·.¸¸.
    • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

      I don’t understand how it will leave Brando out. She’s not on the OC. I wish they would just get rid of Kim and Brandi (and they can honestly take Kyle with them too). Those three are past their due date and now are smelling to high heaven!

      • twifan2

        I think Jeanna would go after TamTrash. Revenge? :/

        • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

          Oooooh, I hope so! But then Trampra said that Jeana was a supporter of hers during Simon’s lawsuit. If I were Jeana, I would have never forgiven that little trashcan HO. I hope Jeana puts Trampra in her place. Although honestly, I wish Trampra would just be fired.

          • twifan2

            My hopes were dashed when that rumor of TamTrash were said to be false. I cried in my sprinkles all day. :'(

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Yeah, it caused me a major league bummer too! 🙁

  • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

    This is the Brandi’s defining moment. This was the exact moment I started to really loathe her because she is a mother and for any 40 year old to get that wasted–you have to be REALLY messed up. I have NEVER in my life been that messed up!

    • twifan2

      Well for me I’ve come close, but NOPE never like Brando!
      I’d be too embarrassed to wear something like she has on in the very top pic. Then to get totally wasted?! No thank you!

    • Guardian

      Oh man . . . I could have gone the rest of my life without this close up.

      • twifan2

        In a way it’s better than listening to Gia’s music video. :/

        • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

          Hahahaha. Oh that video–horrific–and embarrassing. Even with auto-tune to help, that child CANNOT sign!

          • twifan2

            I can’t make out some of the words either!
            She garbles them! >(

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            I think it’s safe to say that she has no talent. The song is awful too. And to pay this tribute to her mother like she’s some saint is just delusional. Of course, she is Trelusional’s daughter after all!

          • Guardian

            I said in my comments under that article that I had no idea denial was genetic.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            HAHAHAHAHA!!!

          • Guardian

            I’ll sum it up for you – shame on all of us.

          • twifan2

            For what? For having morals? For doing what’s right?
            SHAME on her for inflicting us to her ‘art’! ;p

          • Guardian

            Between B’s butt and G’s song, I’ve just added days to my misery. And yes, for wanting justice we are haters though she left that gem out.

          • twifan2

            How a Hot Toddy for you pain? 🙂
            Then I be a ‘hater’ too. I want justice!
            🙂

          • Guardian

            Been sipping chicken broth which doesn’t exactly mix well with the Halls cough drops. I’d like her to write a song about how the creditors feel about being screwed and most likely never getting paid back.

          • twifan2

            Ask her to write one like that. Bet she deletes your comment!
            She hates being ‘honest’ & doing the ‘right’ thing. smh

          • Guardian

            Like mother, like daughter. Of course she then hides behind the fact that she is only 13, but she is a Queen. Next time she writes a song I’d suggest she use a thesaurus and a list of synonyms. Or a professional.

          • Guardian

            I think you meant sing but at least if she had signed we would have been spared her voice and the lyrics.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Yup–typing too quickly and mixed up a couple of letters.

          • Guardian

            I hear ya. Do it all the time – love the edit feature.

          • twifan2

            THAT was auto-tuned? Really?! It was still bad!

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Yes, it was. My husband’s company is in audio/music and he told me how to tell if something is auto-tuned. There’s a certain electronic vibe to it–and it’s not easy to spot because so many singers use it. And it doesn’t even work as well–as you can tell in her newest music video. See, the lyrics that end without music going onto the next piece in the song–when she HAS to rely on her voice alone, her voice gets VERY iffy. But then at the end of one set of lyrics when the music continues, the auto-tune can also continue so it makes it sound better. It’s like the music leads the way with the voice.

            It’s really hard to explain! I just read what I wrote and I didn’t explain it well–but I don’t know how to. My husband once had me hear two versions of a piece of music–one auto-tuned and the other “raw.” The auto-tuned had a very different sound to it–as have ALL of 3KTs vidoes.

          • twifan2

            Ok, thanks 4Hs.
            I’m going to try & listen to real music & see if I can tell the diff. 🙂

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            If you listen to music from today and compare it to the songs made before auto-tune, you can tell the difference. My husband could explain it to you but he’s in China right now!

          • Guardian

            I wondered, as her voice fades in and out. She sure can’t hit the high notes, no range and her pitch is bad, bad, bad.

          • twifan2

            Inhales heavily too. :/

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Yes! In the parts of the song where she ends a note on her own–THAT is when you can tell!

          • Guardian

            So, just how in the hell do they ever give a live concert? Do they just lip synch?

          • twifan2

            They did at their first & last concert last Dec. It was a bad ‘concert’! :/

          • Guardian

            I remember not seeing any instruments so kind of figured but how long can/could they keep that up? I’m not into a lot of this anymore but at some point don’t they have to sing live?

          • twifan2

            They’ll try to skirt their way around it, I bet.

          • Guardian

            And now we definitely know why no agent of note has stepped forward.

          • twifan2

            Agents know two of the girls have limited talent.
            Alexi is the one more talented than the 2 in the group. Maybe that’s why she wasn’t in this video?! :/

          • Guardian

            Maybe it was too embarrassing for her. I think Gia was trying to pull off Annie Lennox.

          • twifan2
          • Guardian

            OOOOOOOOhhhhhhhhhh! If this were G, T would stand up and say, “Isn’t she great! She’s been dancing for years!”

          • twifan2

            ‘Such a natural!’
            standing ovation* 🙂

          • Guardian

            “She was born to entertain (ambulance rolls up).”

        • Guardian

          Oh yeahhhhh, I just watched and listened to it and then went off with some comments. I have a flu and cold and decided to add to my misery. Someone stop this child – or let them do this in a garage or a basement away from the public.

          • twifan2

            It was really an amateurish attempt-imo.
            The song was eeh at best.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Not even eeh. More like ugh.

          • twifan2
          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            OMG–that’s terrible but so funny!

          • Lawd hav’ mercy! I’ve seen it all.

          • twifan2
          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Hahahahahahaha! I just spit out my tea!

          • twifan2

            🙂
            *hands over paper towel sheet*

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Thank you. I am literally wiping up iced tea from my lap. Thank goodness I’m on my iPad or my keyboard would be a mess!

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            That poor lady though! I hope she didn’t hurt herself badly. That would be so embarrassing. It’s my motivation for going to the gym tomorrow too!

          • twifan2

            Uh that’s a guy, 4H.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            How can you tell? Looks female to me!

          • twifan2

            I saw the bigger pic of this one. It was under Wal-Mart shopper-man overboard on aisle 6! 😀

          • twifan2

            Be careful at the gym,4Hs!
            It can be a dangerous place! 😉

            http://p.fod4.com/p/media/3b9863acb7/OBn4cscqQeOctVsBtyhU_Workout%20Row%20Flip%20Fail.gif

          • Guardian

            Sure is flexible, I’ll give him that.

          • Tola

            Omg, HILARIOUS!

          • Guardian

            If she/they were trying out for a talent show on TV, they wouldn’t make it past the first round of try outs.

          • twifan2

            Maybe as a freak show novelty act?

          • Guardian

            Not even!

          • twifan2

            Chick needs to get an education pronto!

          • Guardian

            She’s too young to get that she is being used by everyone in this um, endeavor(?). She has no range, her voice is weak, and she pitches all over the place. Some of this can be improved but given the competition out there, not nearly enough. I get this is a teenage dream but I don’t think she does. Can you imagine what she is being told? Noticed when being interviewed by the adults last week that none commented on her talent. Cause they know she doesn’t have much, ‘er any.

          • twifan2

            I saw that. The reporters only want to talk about her mom in prison & she has to take it if she wants FREE publicity!
            She’s going to hit rock bottom on the ‘self-esteem’ meter going the way she is! smh

          • Guardian

            One would think, but this kid is clearly cut and molded from the same cloth as her mother. Said it before, and I’ll say it again, if they had any real talent they would have been picked up by now. But savvy agents, for all of the free publicity they could get by piggy backing from her parents, are just not buying it. They would have to invest a fortune and gamble on a return. Too many out there now who are ready-made.

          • twifan2

            ITA! 🙂
            They-Gia-really isn’t ‘talented’!
            Tre has drummed into her head that she is. Rude awakening in the near future for Gia!

          • Guardian

            It’s a tough business even for the talented. The one girl in the group has some ability which may bring a parting of the ways – especially since this was a solo for Gia but really represents the group. Reminds me of the birthday song she wrote and sang for Milania a few years ago, only with some teen angst.

          • twifan2

            I noticed that the third girl of the group wasn’t in the video. That girl does have talent-imo.
            Gia jellyous perhaps?
            That teenie song was mediocre. Her ‘singing’ was worse!

          • Guardian

            Jealousy is a common thread in the family as well. Wonder if they went to visit T this weekend?

          • twifan2

            Depends on the weather. If snowy, foggy no visiting hours. Security closes down.

          • twifan2

            I think that ‘jellyous’ is on their fambly crest. :/

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Thank you!

      • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

        Sorry!

        • Guardian

          My eyes!!!! Oh my eyes!!!!!

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Hahahahaha.

          • Guardian

            By the way, the picture of her attempting to kiss that guy reminds me of a cow going after a salt block.

          • twifan2
          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Hahahahahahaha!

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            It truly does. She looks like she’s about to attack him like in that movie Red Dragon where the serial killer bites the reporters tongue off!

          • Guardian

            Men best wear some garlic buds when they are around her. I still can’t figure out what she was (not) wearing? She is just so thin. And, you know, for someone who hates cheaters, she sure likes to strip down around husbands – her bikinis, etc.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            I pity the poor men who go out with this stalking, vulgar, drunk-as-shit piece of work. Wow. She’s like a psycho–SWF!

          • Guardian

            They go out with her for one reason only and it ain’t for a relationship. How desperate must they be? She’s a walking STD or whatever the term is for it now.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Exactly. Desperate famewhores, just like her. None of those people care about her. From what I can tell, she has only one long-term friend who is as messed up as Brandi. Brandi can’t hold onto friends because she’s a terrible one herself. Two-faced, will screw-you-over-in-minute and lie about you POS.

          • Guardian

            I caught a re-run of an Apprentice episode last night – the one where she claims to have a panic attack and high tails it back to her room. I’m sure she went back to drink with a Xanax as no one was bothering her. With the cameras on her, she sure didn’t look like the panic attacks I have seen. She also said in this episode that she doesn’t lie. Riiiggghhtt! At least she has Kim for a friend now.

    • Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!! Pardon me while I go throw up!

      • Guardian

        I almost did. If she goes back for anymore custody issues I would think this would put a judge over the edge. Or at least induce substantial nausea.

        • Oh that poor judge having to preside over this fishy case. YUCK!!

          • Guardian

            Wonder how B would feel if some sorry, drunk slut went after one of her boys when they are older? Wonder how she explains this to them as this was on TMZ and I saw the pictures in several places. Surely they have friends, despite their young age.

          • twifan2

            Like an Adrienne? 😮

          • Guardian

            At least A hasn’t been seen looking like this. But dating someone that young? I know it’s such a double standard but . . .

          • twifan2

            I don’t think Adrienne would ever look like that. :/
            But I meant if Adrienne were to ‘date’ one of her boys…OMG!
            The clencher would be a Brandi clone ‘marrying’ one of her boys! OMG!

          • Guardian

            Gotcha – damn fever. Wonder what B would do? I wouldn’t wish a B clone on anyone.

          • twifan2

            Not even on Tre?
            Think about it thoroughly, Guardian! 🙂

          • Guardian

            A three way with Joe.

          • twifan2

            GROSS!
            EEEEWWWWWWWWWWW

          • twifan2
          • twifan2
      • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

        I sowwy. 😀

        • Guardian

          Tell me that little string hanging down is from her um, dress?

          • twifan2

            😀
            That’s her tampon string.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            It’s her tampon string. Absolutely and without a doubt. Skanky Trashville at her finest.

          • Guardian

            Ok – now I’m going to be sick.

          • 4theHighHeels_4theRawDeals

            Pretty gross. Like Trashi, the tampon’s owner.

          • twifan2
          • Guardian

            Oi!!!!!!!!!!

          • twifan2

            Did it clear your sinuses, Guardian? 😉

          • Guardian

            Hee Haw – if you get my meaning. I suddenly feel like eating some oats. Hmmmm . . .

          • twifan2

            Oatmeal with strawberries. YUM! 🙂

          • Guardian

            That does sound tasty but alas no strawberries so I’m eating an almond Snickers. Is it feed a fever and starve a cold or the other way around? Like I care but . . .

          • twifan2

            No strawberries? OMG!
            The inhumanity of it all. 🙁
            I had some Praline Turtles a bit ago. Sticky good! 🙂

          • Guardian

            Sounds even better. I posted this down below too but did you see the Apprentice episode where Brandi feigned a panic attack and had to leave her team? The cameras were on her and it was total bs. She went back to her room to drink and pop a Xanax. She also said in the episode that she doesn’t lie. Funny thing about people who say that – they’re usually the biggest liars going.

          • twifan2

            I saw epi. I was rolling my eyes all over the place about her ‘I don’t lie’ comment! :/
            You just know she was using, abusing! She had to have a Xani to get thru the day! 😀

          • Guardian

            Washed down with plenty of alcohol. She could have taken the Xanax and stayed right where she was, but she couldn’t drink in front of them.

          • twifan2

            She could have filled an empty water bottle with vodka.
            & drank to her heart’s content. 🙂

          • Guardian

            Yeah but like any good addict she knew they would smell it, she’d be stumbling around and Kenya would go in for the kill. The Trump don’t like drunks nor drinking on the job. Of course I didn’t like Rivera walking around with his undershorts on (not to mention the dark socks and shoes). EEEEEEEEEwwwwwwwww!

          • twifan2
          • Guardian

            Well . . . there goes the Snickers! Actually my fever has shot up again so I’m going to log off and try to take something to get it down. Have a great night and thanks sooooo much for the nightmare!

          • twifan2

            You are so very welcomed!
            Feel better-soon! 🙂

          • Guardian

            Thank you . . . I hope so, I’m too old for this crap! Over and out.

  • Rochelle Barozzi

    LOLOL!!!!

  • Tola

    Omg! In the first pic her bottom lip hangs down while going in for a kiss. So GROSS.