Will The Real Bobby Ciasulli Take The Stand!

Posted on Nov 11 2014 - 5:48pm by BeachSpin

Bobby

With “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” officially ending tonight, the time has come to hammer the last nails of truth into the Jim Marchese/Bobby Ciasulli combat coffin. Bobby, also affectionately known by only his closest adversaries as ‘Booby’, announced that he would be releasing a ‘truth video’ soon. We all know that the truth has been in short supply on Ciasulli’s end this year, but instead of clearing up all of the shifty holes that tend appear when one scampers to the bathroom, Bobby has decided, albeit late, that the time has arrived to expose the REAL Jim MarcheseJim is ready to defend himself, and has called for a Bravo Twitter ‘trial’ tonight at 7:00 pm EST. 

[RELATED] Exposed: Meet Bobby Ciasulli The Millionaire

This event should jack the FUN meter far past the mark of a dreary and redundant reunion hour, and All About The Tea has been called to present the ‘evidence’ segment of the hearing. Due to our extensive reporting on the Ciasulli fakery all season, this will be a snap, and we are more than happy to join in the fun.

EXHIBIT A: THE CONSPIRACY

Bobby Ciasulli appears to be a desperate, grasping, fame seeking hustler. He allowed Jim, via legal and publicly exposed contract, to broker a spot for him on the show, and submitted a cringe worthy bio to Bravo selling himself as a swanky, wealthy playboy ready and willing to bring the drama fireworks…anything to see his face on a television screen. He lovingly refers to himself as “Big Sexy”, and also claims to be known as The Fonz, Richard Gear and Bachelor Bobby (HIS spellings), due to his white hot dating prowess. Nothing was off limits for a grab at the gold ring of stardom, including faking his true identity, faking a love interest, faking personality, passions, ANYTHING he had to do, including seeking to connect with anyone who could give him a leg up on the morally shaky, but reflection loving, dream come true, ladder of fame. Picture an uncreative and anxiously arrogant, semi masculine version of Lucy Ricardo…..the goal was tacky reality show business, or BUST!

Bobby Ciasulli Contract Watermark

EXHIBIT B:  THE FAMEWHORE OBJECTIVE

Bobby thrives on attention from the adoring masses. As heir to several lucrative family owned auto dealerships, he is gleeful in his role of the showy commercial salesman. This Housewives Groupie made it his personal mission to connect with as many Housewives as humanly possible, and must have faked passionate interests in as many girly pursuits as necessary to justify the giddy group photos that he proudly displayed on his Facebook page.

[MUST READ] Exclusive: Bobby Ciasulli’s Contract With Jim Marchese EXPOSED! 

He further worked his hero next door shtick by signing on to be a local volunteer fireman. Sincerely distressed, civil servant selfies translate to social media GOLD, and provide the perfect heart stirring sprinkles to the top his working man, cutie pie image.  Oh and never mind that burning vehicle cluttering his shot…. “Flying down the road in a half million dollar red truck” is his favorite.”

EXHIBIT C:  THE FRAUD

Bravo just wasn’t feeling the ‘Mr. Sexy Conquers New Jersey’ angle, so it was time for Plan B.  Hmmm…we need humble, middle class, guy next door, devoted to whoever will take the bait without the scary, legal marriage part, with a dash of hero thrown in.  Throw them all together and VOILA…the Bobby we all witnessed this season.  That would be fine for a really painful sitcom…but for a show that brands itself as reality TV, it was quite a stretch. 

FRAUD: Bobby is a humble, middle class guy.

TRUTH:  Bobby’s family owns an auto dealership chain that boasts sales in the excess of $300 million last year. He lives in a luxury 9000 sq ft luxury estate in a prestigious golf community, calls himself an avid art collector, and lists “cruising in my Ferrari and hitting the Mediterranean in my families 110 foot yacht,”  as his current loves. 

ciasulli_garageFloor (1)

FRAUD: Bobby is a devoted boyfriend, and is setting the stage to pop the question to Nicole Napolitano.

TRUTH: Bobby describes himself as, “of coarse big sexy because of the serial dating ive done over the last year and a half.  So either I’m a big fish in a small pond or I have some amazing colognes.”  There was zero mention of Nicole in his bio.  Bobby must have whipped up to the corner of Dunkin and Main in his Maserati, and swooped Nicole up with the promise of fulfilling all of her jelly filled fantasies of fame…as long as she smiled pretty and promised to dress like a  J-Lo knockoff.

FRAUD: Bobby’s identity centers around being a zealously committed volunteer fireman.

TRUTH: Bobby began fireman school, in May of 2013.  He signed the ‘PLEASE Make Me Famous’ contract with Jim 2 months EARLIER, in March. Let the sham begin, and get that smartphone camera focused!

The bottom line is that Bobby Ciasulli wants to be a celebrity so badly that he is willing to create, manage and distort the truth of his past, present, and future. Reality TV? I think not. 

Please use #RHONJTrial and vote GUILTY or NOT GUILTY.

 

 

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About the Author

I am a coastal girl who loves the outdoors, and writing about the sneaky and silly side of reality TV. My bio is short, but my snark is endless, and I love writing for the sharpest posters in the world. Follow me on Facebook

  • Trippinhhard

    Fame is a drug and Bobby definitely wanted fame, but what he got was an embarrassment to his family.. Bobby will you come out of the bathroom and play with us..

    • Birdie11

      It’s too SCARY out here!!

      • Trippinhhard

        What was the reason for his hiding like a child..

        • WestCoastFeed

          It was to escape the cameras.

        • Birdie11

          He was being confronted with info he couldn’t articulate answers for…so he ran and isolated himself.

        • Harleygirl0685

          Maybe he just liked hearing his named screeched out of the twins mouth over and over! I wish to God I could get them screeching BOBBY out of my head ! I’m so glad my sons name is not BOBBY 🙂

    • Ahahahaha! Samra, you’re hilarious!!

      • Trippinhhard

        Just making fun of a damn fool, I bet his parents are so proud of him…
        Um “Big Sexy” that my husband not you, he should be called “big Ussy”,
        because that’s what he is…….

        • DoneWithBravo

          He should also go back to school! Of “coarse”????????? What kind of education (or lack thereof) are people in NJ getting?

          • WestCoastFeed

            Jim probably wrote it. His spelling is atrocious.

          • DoneWithBravo

            True. I don’t respect anyone who has gone through college and still cannot formulate a decent sentence. I once worked for an attorney (I was a paralegal for many years) and never noticed his lack of sentence structure until he hand-wrote a note for me. I quit after that.

          • Trippinhhard

            He’s too old, he probably barely got out if high school..

          • Bingo!

        • HAHAHAHAHA! ROFLMAO!!

  • WestCoastFeed

    Bobby wanted to be on the show. Surprising? No, all the newbies wanted it,, too. Is this the bio that Jim wrote .? . I like Bobby. He.s the best of the new ies

    • dj j

      If Jim wrote this, he is an uneducated tool, too. The horrible grammer, spelling, and capitalization of words, like Concerts, is a good tell. Bobby is worse than Jim, at least Jim is an a hole, Bobby is, but hides behind his fake “persona”. I hope neither get another season.

      • WestCoastFeed

        I don’t find bobby fake at all. I knew he was rich before this season aired. And anyone who becomes a firefighter has my admiration. It is a very dangerous job. It doesn’t matter one bit to me why, he joined. Hooray to him for doing it.

        • murlut

          I liked Bobby too until the pictures came out and I seen the look on his face. On the 3rd show that look is still there. I think they busted him, you can just see it on his face. He isn’t a firefighter, he is a volunteer not a full fledged firefighter. Its not his job, he has no job

    • Harleygirl0685

      Jim’s my new fav! I’m gonna miss his sarcasm!

  • WestCoastFeed

    Off t topic. Tee has jus t droopped the price on her house by $$500K.

    • Thanks West. As if $500k makes any difference, it’s still over priced and no one will buy a $3 million dollar house valued at $1.5 million.

      • WestCoastFeed

        With mortgages for more than it is worth.

        • Exactly!! What is her motive here?

          • WestCoastFeed

            I wonder if she dropped the prices on the other houses?

          • Check if you can. Let us know.

          • DLister

            I think she needs a house dropped on her, Wicked Witch of the East style.

          • murlut

            money

        • DoneWithBravo

          Then it’ll be a shortsale. She needs to unload it in any case.

        • Harleygirl0685

          So at the risk of sounding really stupid…when the house sells, does every dime go to the bank? If so, where will Joe and the girls go? We know Teresa has a roof over her head for 15 months. Do they even have the means to support themselves? The whole financial thing confuses me cause in reality it seems to me that every business venture was started with stolen money, so shouldn’t the government be getting all , if there is any profits ? I just don’t understand how this all works.

          • murlut

            They can go live in a rental, you know the ones Teresa wanted to rent to everyone else. I am sure if they were to make a profit on selling the house, the feds would scoop in and take it the minute it closed. I keep thinking of the poor lady who rented an apartment from Joe and Teresa. All the tenants begged them to fix the stairs in the slummy apartment. The stairs collapsed on a female tenant and she was severely injured and sued Joe and Teresa. She is one of those who never got paid. Joe and Teresa deserve no sympathy.

    • Harleygirl0685

      OMG, OMG,OMG…WELCOME BACK! I sure missed you! I always love reading your comments and they were noticeably missing the last few weeks!! I hope you bought a 100yr warranty on your new laptop cause we can’t have you missing for that long ever again!!!!

    • murlut

      Hi WCF. Teresa cant sell that house for anything over 2 mil. Heard that’s what its appraised for.

  • This was absolutely fantastic! So much tongue in cheek humor both on the surface and between the lines, you guys at AATT really are the best out there. The only thing I can say about the RH series at this point at this late stage is that at least it gives a forum for morons like this to humiliate themselves nationally and I suppose globally since this show is on the air all over the world.

    • Harleygirl0685

      These writers are the funniest out there! Love being here, it’s a guaranteed smile!

    • BeachSpin

      Thank u ucanlead!! There was lots of amusing material to work with!! 😀

  • DLister

    His famewhore fuckery is masterful. I’ll give him that.

  • HeatNational

    Bobby and Jim are both fame whores! Do we really believe that Jim isn’t exactly like what he’s trying to paint Bobby to be?! Of course they are both the same, and that’s why they have been friends for so long.

    I am just upset nobody outed Jim and the fact he likes it up his @$$ with a dildo.

    I think RHONJ is officially done.

    • murlut

      I didn’t like Jim at the beginning but then I had to give him kudos for calling them all out. Bobby was a housewives ho and the pics are proof. I think he latched on to Nicole for a piece and when the housewives gig came up, he was hooked. I hope the two squeeling twin pigs are canned and if Dina doesn’t return, BONUS

      • HeatNational

        I don’t like anybody in this franchise. But I really can’t stand Jim. He’s just too over the top. We do realize he’s close to being middle aged and he acts like a vengeful teenager, right? And can someone please out him and his love of @$$play already?

  • Jersey

    Did Bobby say anything about this yet? I’m still waiting on that video he was going on about.

    • Not a word. Crickets! And no video.

    • murlut

      What would he say, he was BUSTED. It was hilarious. The pictures said it all. Bobby wanted to be on the show and NICOLE was looking for money. Match made in heaven

  • Bonita Gee

    It was the most BORING Housewife Reunion I’ve ever seen… The most exciting part was when Jim M. Called Bobby out with those ‘Fame Whore” pics of Bobby Showing up at EVERY Family book signing. That was hilarious!! ……. Then said to Bobby “”I let you talk, now sit down, be quiet, and be the little bitch you are and shut the fuck up! Is there a bathroom somewhere for you to hide?!” then told Rino “you were HIDING two miles up the road in a hotel.” Dayyyuummn!!