David Tutera’s CELEBrations Recap: Wowing JWoww [Episode 2]

Posted on Aug 9 2014 - 1:50am by Dani-K

David Tutera's Celebrations

On this week’s episode of “CELEBrations,” Slomique informs David that this week’s last-minute party is with Jenni JWoww Farley. David says he’s never heard of her, but after a montage of Jersey Shore photos, he remembers that they are obnoxious and had a hit show. You can see David make a mental note. Jenni is throwing a surprise party for her fiancé, Roger, in three days. After David and Monte slam their super-tans and steroids, they hop onto airplane for NYC, abandoning the unpacking at the new house.

David Tutera's Celebrations

Once in NY, as David makes empty promises to Joey about spending time together, as a family, Slomique calls and says Jwoww and her people are “demanding” to see David right now. Jwoww and her friend Dionne are waiting for David in his boring, brown paint, office. Dionne asks for alcohol. Jenni doesn’t. (Jenni is obviously pregnant, but never addresses it – at all.) Roger is turning 39 and Jenni wants to throw a surprise party. The story is that David is throwing a sweet-16 party for a girl who has requested a cast member from the Jersey Shore

Jersey Shore

These are Jenni’s requests for Roger’s party: Invite a sister that Roger hasn’t spoken to in two years. Nothing can go wrong with that one. Invite a UFC fighter, get a motorcycle for Roger, have edible sushi on naked people, aerial silk acrobats, elephants carrying strippers, animal balloons blown up by a toothless woman, and drag queens with baloney on their parts. (Helpful hint: Mayonnaise will help it stick.) The biggest disagreement is location of the venue. Jenni wants New Jersey. David wants New York. Really, he just doesn’t want to go to Jersey. 

Jersey Shore

After the break, the staged phone call from Jenni interrupts Montre and David walking around NY in the rain. Jenni wants to bring her personal fashion designer into the mix and wants David to come shop in NJ. After a roundabout discussion on who’s picking out the dress she’ll wear, Jenni or David, Jenni agrees to come to NY, with the caveat the party will be held in NJ. David says no. Jenni says yes.

David Tutera's Celebrations

Cat the gypsy-lady with a beehive is the special designer of Jenni’s and she has brought dresses that are way too old for JWoww (or Jenni for that matter). Jenni tries on in a lacey, fluff of a maternity dress that looks like something Tinkerbelle would wear in her big scene. She announces this is her final choice, and she’s not trying on the others, so there. David wonders why they bothered with all this just to try on one dress. (So are we, David.) 

David Tutera's Celebrations

At the motorcycle store, Jenni gives David a pink, blinged-out tee shirt that says David Loves Jersey. By their own admission, these two know nothing about motorcycles, but are there to pick out one for Roger. Jenni tells David how Roger had to sell his bike after Hurricane Sandy. And how Roger never asks for anything and is very supportive. Jenni finds the bike she wants in the shop, and wouldn’t you know it, someone has already put a deposit on it. Darn it! I hate it when that happens. When you show up at a pre-established place with a film crew and they don’t have what you came in for. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

It’s the day of the party and David is on his way to NJ (shocker). The event is being held at Hemingway’s in Seaside Heights. This makes perfect sense as I’m sure Roger and his friends are all verse in the literature of Ernest Hemingway. “The Sun Also Rises…After You Pass Out” is probably their fav. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

Slomique is trying to organize the party-goers inside. Jenni and Roger are on the way. If Roger knows what’s going on, he isn’t letting on. It takes several seconds for him to put two and two together. Roger’s sister is announced and Roger seems happy. The UFC fighter, Chris Weidman, is announced and Roger is ecstatic. He can’t stop hugging the guy. Sorry, sis. There are no strippers on elephants and I am very disappointed. A little later on, Jenni brings out another surprise. Oh, what could it be? It’s ex-porn star Jenna Jamesonpsych! (Roger actually wished for this.) It’s the motorcycle. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

David declares the evening a success and pledges to come back to New Jersey…if he has another reality gig and is getting paid, that is.

 

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  • Thanks for another great recap Dani-K. Jwoww grosses me out. It’s hard to watch both her and Roger. Jwoww thinks she has a career and they both think a little too highly of themselves for my liking.

    • Dani-K

      Thanks Dr. I’m telling you, Jwoww is addicted to being on tv. I’m sure she’s trying to find something right now about her life with baby. Hopefully the networks will pass.

  • Lorn

    JWow’s face looks terrible now and the pregnancy just accentuates her bad plastic surgery.

    • Hey Lorn! Haven’t seen you in awhile. Hope all is well with you.

      • Lorn

        Hey Doc! I’ve been really busy with work and haven’t had a lot of time to shoot the breeze. I hope all is well on your end and you’re having a happy fall? I love this time of year! Keep in-touch!

  • Bonita Gee

    She said on an interview I saw that she “does NOT like being pregnant” She’s looking forward to having a baby but not embracing the pregnancy thing……. DAMN…… Alrighty then!

    • I’ve been waiting on your ass all day. Where you been? LOL!!!

      Jwoww looks a hot FAT mess pregnant. Pregnancy and Jwoww do not mix.

      • Bonita Gee

        HEY DR. what’s up?? Yeah the dress she wore clearly says she’s NOT into that pregnancy………. LOL! it’s like she’s in denial of her pregnancy…… sheese!

        • Pregnancy does not look good on some all women, she’s one of them.

  • DCR1

    That poor baby will have to deal with those two until the age of 18, its probably in her womb screaming somebody, anybody adopt meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

  • Samantha

    She is SOOO fake and ridiculous she was born and raised in NY so she is NOT a jersey girl
    And what is this fake boston accent every time she says the word party. Pahhhhh tee. Ugh

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