David Tutera’s CELEBrations Recap: Taylor’s Wedding [Episode 1]

Posted on Aug 2 2014 - 2:18am by Dani-K

David Tutera's Celebrations

David Tutera is known for putting on fantastically outrageous weddings, but has he met his match working with these CELEBrities? Time will tell. The first episode opens with an update on his personal life, adorable daughter Cielo and boyfriend, Joey. They are moving into a new house.

David Tutera's Celebrations

At the paint store to pick out color for Cielo’s new room with assistant Montre. David gets a call from Taylor Armstrong, ex-Real Housewife of “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.” She is getting married in two weeks, is overwhelmed with decisions and wants David to take over for her. She’d like to elope, but has already sent out the invitations. A brief history is given on Taylor, cue the sad music. David thinks Taylor is crazy, but he’s a fan, so he says okay. 

David has a new assistant, Slomique, and they are on their way to meet Taylor and her fiancé, John at a restaurant to discuss the wedding. What they actually discuss is Taylor and her 8 different personalities. Today she’s in Liberace-mode, but tomorrow it could be ski-with-friends-mode. Back to the wedding planning, Taylor wants the theme to be “elegant sexy” but “age appropriate” and definitely not a “hoe-down.” Taylor says, “I’ll be the only ho down.” Good one, Taylor

David Tutera's Celebrations

She explains that her first wedding wasn’t something that was celebrated, so she wants this one to be a celebration. Taylor warns David that her Beverly Hills friends are divas, but fun divas if he can keep them happy. After lunch, David reflects with Slomique and says that he gets Taylor. Slomique warns him to watch out; he’s only met personality # 1. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

It’s time to try on dresses, and Taylor is shocked that the dresses are on hangers and on racks. She’s thinking couture. I’m thinking, why wasn’t this the first thing accomplished on the wedding things to-do list. Taylor’s mom is there to see the dresses, her daughter Kennedy, and so is Dwight, who’s hilarious, but he’s not helping. Hopefully, we will see more of Dwight. The first dress looks like something Reba McIntire designed. The second dress is a flat out, no. The third looks like bathroom tile, according to daughter Kennedy. And the fourth dress is a fluffy mess. Panic attack ensues. Taylor announces that she will not look like a fool on her wedding day. That remains to be seen. She storms off, fluff following.

David Tutera's Celebrations

Taylor’s mom is wise enough to shut down the episode of ‘say yes to the dress’ aptly renamed, ‘say no to the pro.’ Taylor asks to speak to David out front. She’s in full meltdown mode. Probably personality #3. David goes for the jugular real issue and asks why Taylor cares more about what other people think? This is about what she thinks. Just then, a TMZ bus rolls up. Taylor snaps from personality #3 to personality #7. She waves, smiles, and tells them to say hi to Harvey. The minute the bus pulls away, Taylor snaps back to personality #3 and asks David if she needs to find another wedding planner. David, this was your out! Not to be out-diva’d, David reassures Taylor that everything will be fine.

David Tutera's Celebrations

For some reason, Taylor wants to talk to David about the wedding at a horse ranch the following day. She is feeling very zen, Not sure what personality number this is, but Taylor says there’s much more to her than Beverly Hills. Taylor tells David that she and John are fighting now, and they never fight. *Cough, cough* Back in the days of Season 1 RHOBH, Taylor felt like a Stepford wife, now she doesn’t. David is the voice of reason and asks the question: Are they ready to get married? In the next few minutes of the heart to heart, David asks why Taylor stayed with Russell for so long. She explains, but speaking ill of the dead feels wrong, so I won’t. They decide that Taylor is a Phoenix rising from the ashes. Taylor tells David that he’s part therapist/part wedding planner. David, raise your fees! 

David Tutera's Celebrations

David Tutera's Celebrations

The wedding day has finally arrived! David predicts that it won’t go smoothly, but do they ever? The wedding venue is behind schedule because of the excessive amount of chandeliers that Taylor insisted on because chandeliers just scream sexy-elegant. There is an issue with a picture hanging high in the room. Slomique doesn’t like it. The girl from the venue says that David knows all about it, understands it can’t be moved, and suggests they just move on with jazz hands for extra drama. Slomique doesn’t like this and reads her like yesterday’s TMZ. Snap! David senses tension. Slomique gives David the day’s instructions and tells him to go be with his bride. Wait a minute. Who’s the boss? Whose show is this? I’m confused. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

Taylor, in a personality number that is pure panic, has arrived. She’s about to cry and hasn’t written her vows. Not to mention, her friends will wear high-heels and what if they sink into the grass? David thinks Taylor needs a drink. No she doesn’t. See prior episodes of Couples Therapy

David Tutera's Celebrations

David has a sit-down with Slomique and schools her on who the real boss is. This isn’t high school. Slomique takes it pretty well. Way to nip that in the bud, David!

Back to Taylor and her freak-out session, David tells her that if she’ll be a good, calm girl, he’ll give her a treat. He brings out the dress and Taylor cries and shakes her head. After the commercial, we learn that these are tears of joy. The dress is perfect. Kennedy likes it too. Taylor doesn’t seem in a rush to try it on, so that kind of tells us that she knew it would fit.

David Tutera's Celebrations

John the fiancé takes David aside to tell him he has a surprise he’d like to announce at the reception. David doesn’t like surprises. John says it’s a good one. David gives his permission. As Taylor gets dressed, she confesses that she has still not written her vows. She plans to wing it. David tell her she is a Real Bride, not a Real Housewife. 

David Tutera's Celebrations

At the wedding we see Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Dr. Jenn Berman, and the Maloofs with separate dates. Taylor gives a speech and promises to be way less crazy. Luckily there was no lightning in the area. John’s announcement is that the adoption for Kennedy has come through. And they all live happily ever after…until the next reality show presents itself.

 

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About the Author

I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run. For more information, please visit me at: Twitter* * Website* * Facebook*

  • Jennymckitty

    I watched this mess. It felt very scripted. Taylor is a nut job but she brought an extra bag of crazy with her. It was funny to see her turn it off in a nanosecond when the TMZ bus showed up. It made me sick to hear her and David bring up Russ so much. Just stop talking about him on TV! The poor man is dead and has no way to defend himself.

    • georgie

      SO agree, time to stop dragging her daughter’s father through the mud. Let him rest in peace. Can’t help but notice yet again, Taylor seems to be the one with rage issues. She has an insanely short fuse on Real Housewives, while her deceased husband seemed so quiet and gentle. Her rage issue was documented again on Couples Therapy, and now this show. hmmm. Feel so badly for her little girl.

  • Thanks for a great recap Dani-K!

    I like this show. David knows how to entertain the masses and I think he has another hit on his hands with CELEBrations!

  • TartLemon

    I enjoy David Tutera’s shows, but refused to watch this one because I didn’t want to add to the viewership #s. I did notice in the recap Camille Grammer was not present. Interesting especially since Taylor blamed finding out about Camille’s (supposed) abuse for an excuse to act so badly on Couple’s Therapy.

    • RealitytvJunkie

      I was wondering where she was as well. Maybe she was still recovering from her cancer procedure.

  • RealitytvJunkie

    People that stress out about weddings drive me insane. Stop overcompensating. It’s a happy time.