Alright, Crowners (can we make that a thing?) here comes the second episode of Toddlers & Tiaras: All Grown Up “Game of Crowns.”
Picking up from last week’s fight, reminiscent of a poor man’s “B*tch stole my look,” involving Vanassa Sebastian and Susanna Paliotta, the women arrive at their hotel. Vanassa declares she’s not nervous about rooming with Susanna, just nervous that she might choke her. Susanna rooms with Lynne Diamante and they both agree that the fight was just a result of too much going on. I mean, the flight, how exhausting!
This scene goes right into a sit down between Susanna and Vanassa. Vanassa demands an apology for Susanna’s insensitive comment about her breasts. In this case, I’m siding with Vanassa. You don’t make such comments about a breast cancer survivor. That’s crossing a line.
Susanna wants clarification on what an apology would do. Umm, maybe let us all know you’re not completely horrible? *Spoiler Alert* She’s completely horrible! In the end, after a pretty intense lip-gloss application, courtesy of Vanassa, Susanna apologizes and both ladies agree to start over.
Pageant Eve! The ladies not competing have gathered for what is continually compared by Lynne as “game-day-talk.” I know next to nothing about sports, but I’m pretty sure this has nothing in common with guys talking sports.
Vanassa says she likes Leha, but dear Lord, that face is a wreck! She worries that the judges will clearly see she’s just a 40-footer. The other women giggle and prove they’re just as shallow and bitchy. Shelley Carbone calls Leha manish. They then bet on how Lori-Ann and Leha will place. Real pillars of support! Vanassa bets a stay at her husband’s resort and Susanna bets free jewelry from her business.
Leha announces that if she could just lose 70lbs, she knows she could win. This made me sad. Clearly she’s battling some body-image issues here. In no way does Leha need to lose weight.
First up, the costume competition. Both Leha and Lori-Ann look amazing in their costumes. Leha is dressed in a VERY patriotic outfit while Lori-Ann wears the Native American costume offered to her by Vanassa.
Surprise! Florence Henderson! Hey! She announces the winners, and sadly our ladies don’t win. Leha makes it to the semi-finals, but unfortunately Lori-Ann does not. We go straight into the Evening Gown Competition. I’m really rooting for Leha to win, but sadly it isn’t meant to be. She doesn’t make it into the finals which means that Shelley wins the bet.
The women start cheering and Leha’s husband, Nick, thinks they’re happy because Leha lost, which they totally are. He confronts them, demanding to know what they’re laughing about. It quickly gets out of hand. Lynne actually worries that Nick is going to shoot them. Susanna and Nick start arguing. Susana threatens to get her husband involved and Nick’s father asks how she’d like it if her husband were dead. I’m guessing she wouldn’t. Who says that?
The ladies, minus Shelley, flee backstage where Nick isn’t allowed. For those wondering, Mrs. Texas is crowned Mrs. America 2014. Leha and Lori-Ann meet up with their husbands. Nick has informed them of what took place during the competition. In another room, Susanna is sure Nick is abusive, but admits she has absolutely no facts to back up such a statement.
At Susanna’s “jewelry” business, Shelley and Vanassa have arrived so that Shelley can claim her winnings. If you’re interested, I’m sure you could find these products lining the shelves of your local Family Dollar store. They decide on having a sit down dinner with all six ladies so they can discuss what happened at the Mrs. America pageant.
The women gather at Shelley’s restaurant. Shelley wants Leha to understand she wasn’t happy that Leha lost, she was just happy she won because she bet that Leha would lose, but it’s totally not personal! Leha arrives and everyone can now get down to what happened at the competition. Vanassa starts by saying that the bets against Leha and Lori-Ann weren’t personal. Have fun with that logic. Leha isn’t offended by the bets, just disappointed that her “friends” didn’t have her back and firmly stands by her man.
Susanna, fresh from Bullsh*t Mountain, chimes in and says that Nick threatened to kill Lynne, which of course he didn’t. Lynne goes along with Susanna, but none of the other ladies believe them. Vanassa and Shelley both say in their interviews that it’s a lie. Leha doesn’t believe it for a second either and rationally makes the argument that her husband is a cop. He knows better than to go around making death threats.
Now Leha’s phone starts blowing up and she tries to say it’s the babysitter. No one believes her as they all know it’s just Nick. Leah leaves the dinner and sure enough, husband Nick is outside waiting for her. The episode ends with Susanna lying about Nick almost hitting Leha with his car. She does realize that this is taped, right?
That’s it for this week. Let me know what you thought! Whose side are you on? Did Nick go too far or was he just being a protective husband?
Until next time, Crowners (I’m making this a thing) – Jamie