Melissa & Joe Gorga Voted US Weekly’s Hot Bodies Issue!

Posted on May 23 2014 - 12:58pm by Staff Writer

 

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Both Joe and Melissa Gorga made US Weekly’s Hot Bodies issue. Get it, Melissa!

The hot Italian pop star and mother of three definitely has a smokin’ hot bod! Check out pics of Melissa and Joey during an Easter holiday trip in Miami.

How does she stay fit and healthy, the star of RHONJ tells the mag:

“I definitely work out now harder than I’ve ever worked out in my life. It came naturally to me before I had children, and now I have to work for it, which I’m used to. I’ve always been a hard worker. 

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About the Author

  • noarguingwithstupid

    She may have a good body, but she is a lousy singer and awful writer!!

    • Sara

      I could not agree more. Her God-awful book was the death of her career.

      • WestCoastFeed

        Did you read it, Sara?

        • Sara

          I read excerpts not the entire book.

          • WestCoastFeed

            I just read the stuff that was on-line. I thought it was just another of the silly, vapid books written by a D-list celeb,, but hardly a career killer.

          • Sara

            These shrieking shrews of NJ are festering boils upon this state.All these housewives are authors now. I’m surprised these folks can write, much less read. Hawthorne, Hemingway, Tolstoy, and Dostoevsky must be spinning in their graves!!

          • Happywife

            This is a bit harsh. Don’t you think?

    • WestCoastFeed

      Her voice is not bad. The ballad to Joe was very sweet. I got ripped to shreds for saying this once, but it is still true. She has a better voice than Britney Spears.

      • Birdie11

        Her mistake was trying to be too much like Britney Spears.

        • Izzy

          Hiya Birdie!

          • WestCoastFeed

            Hi, Izzy, My hearing is bad, but it’s good enough to know that Britney Spears is awful.

          • Birdie11

            Hi Izzy…Happy Friday!

        • Happywife

          Finally, someone who sees it.

      • Izzy

        Hi WCF!!! Haven’t you told us that you are hard of hearing? I believe it now! LOL!

        • Birdie11

          LMAO..bazinga!!

          • Izzy

            It was just too easy not to take!!

      • Happywife

        Better voice than Britney Spears?

        • WestCoastFeed

          Yes, because Britney’s voice is dreadful.

    • Izzy

      Hi Naws!!

      • noarguingwithstupid

        Hey Izzy!!!! So good to see you!!

  • Izzy

    Happy Friday everyone!

    I bet this bothers the Te-ape more than the thought of going “away!” Go Melissa!

    • Sara

      I love the term Te-ape!

  • Happywife

    This is a joke right? US Weekly is trash and gets it wrong often. Case in point.

    • WestCoastFeed

      It’s her 3rd year on their hot bodies issue. They have eyes.

      • Happywife

        Disagree. Have you seen Tre’s body? Ten times younger and hotter. Tre works out everyday, Missy doesn’t. There’s no comparison. The only reason Missy is on this list is because of Tre’s legal situation.

        • WestCoastFeed

          Teresa has stumpy legs and no amount of exercise is ever going to lengthen them. Plus she has a thick waistline.

          I guess OK Magazine knew 3 years ago that Teresa was going to be in serious jeopardy with the law and that’s why they chose Melissa then.

          • Happywife

            She looks different in person than on tv and print.

          • Vince Foster, Jr.

            Yes, I agree. She looks like she just came from Madame Tussauds in person. Who does her hair and makeup? A mortician?.

          • WestCoastFeed

            Vince, have you seen this twitter account? @CentrellaPresto. I assume they are the company distributing Fartellini. And notice what company they are tweeting about. How are Mr. Centrella of the Meatball Co. and Mr Presto of the imported wine business associated?

          • Vince Foster, Jr.

            Must have missed it.

          • Happywife

            I don’t get it.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Maybe she is not photgenic because she is ugly.

          • cutie pie

            LOL

          • Birdie11

            BWAHAHAHAHA!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            So she only looks half-way decent in person. After tv and print, what is there?? Paint by numbers???

          • Birdie11

            Maybe her shadow is attractive.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            FOFLOLWMP!!!!

          • Marsbars09

            LOL!

          • twifan2

            Painting by Braille. 😀

          • Marsbars09

            Oh stop it Twi! LOL!
            I hope you enjoy the three day weekend.

          • twifan2

            Hi Hi Mars! 🙂
            Hope you have a good Memorial weekend! 🙂

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Good one, Twi!!!

          • twifan2

            🙂
            He agrees too! 😀

            http://i.imgur.com/gUKkrSs.gif

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Cumberbunny!!! It wouldn’t be a good week-end without him!!

          • twifan2

            OR any other day without Cumberbunny! 🙂
            *le sigh*
            http://i.imgur.com/uuNh3My.gif

          • noarguingwithstupid

            If we could just get rid of that ridiculous woman with the Princess Leah hairdo!!

          • twifan2

            She is a pain!
            BUT she is ‘gone’ now! 🙂

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Yeppers–Can’t have that hanging around a sexy man like Cumber!!

          • twifan2

            He didn’t really like her anyways. 😉

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Here you go Twi. Here you go Naws
            *Le sigh! *Le swoon *Le THUD!

          • twifan2

            Be still my heart! 🙂

          • twifan2

            Even clothed!
            0.0 La La!
            *le drool*

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Drool

          • WestCoastFeed

            Sigh, This is one of the times when being a widow sucks!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Oh My, Oh My!!! Dead.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            And please lets not forget those man hands!!!! OMG!!

          • Birdie11

            HAHAHAHA!!

          • twifan2
          • Marsbars09

            Twi, that’s over the top! NAWS said man hands, not ape hands!

          • twifan2

            Same diff with Tre! 😀

          • Marsbars09

            LOL!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            I love how nonchalant the pooch is!!!

          • twifan2

            Just takes it in stride. 🙂

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Maybe she could borrow a “rack” from the middle ages and stretch those stumpy legs a bit!! Because, you know, no one ever expects the Spanish Inquisition!!

          • WestCoastFeed

            She could use Juicy’s leg stretcher. He has been ready for the Spanish Inquisition for years.

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Wasn’t me! For once I did not start it! LOL!

        • Vince Foster, Jr.

          Teresa has ape hands and is UGLY, no I take that back. Sorry. She is FUGLY. When Joe has sex with Teresa, he uses two bags, one to put over Teresa’s head and one to put over his head.

          • Happywife

            You need to seek professional help for your vile imagination. Unreal.

          • Vince Foster, Jr.

            Yes Happy, I agree, the though of them having sex is vile.

          • Happywife

            What’s your strange obsession with Tre and sex? You may harbor secret feelings for her.

          • Vince Foster, Jr.

            I wouldn’t F Ter with Masterpole’s penis!

          • twifan2

            As strange as your obsession at ‘being’ Tre’s friend. ;D

          • noarguingwithstupid

            So that is considered a two-bagger then????

          • twifan2

            Is that anything like Turdiful? ;D

        • Susie Whats Her Name

          Some women don’t have to work out. Melissa is much younger. Teresa is in her 40’s and has to work out. Also, Teresa’s skin is so leathery looking, I guess due to her age.

          • Happywife

            Tre works out daily to maintain but she’s naturally thin. Without makeup and tanners, she looks like a 20 year old. Very pretty in person.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            A 20 year old trapped in a middle aged woman’s body???? That is new.

          • WestCoastFeed

            NAWS, I think that now we know for sure that Happywife has been punking us. I don’t believe she has ever laid eyes on Teresa.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            She just watches the shows like we do–nothing to her “friendship”!!! She is just a nutbag!!!

          • Susiehj

            The poke-a-dots on her chest do not wash off. Without make-up and hair, she doesn’t look any prettier than she does with it.

          • Vince Foster, Jr.

            She looks like a 20 year fossilized

          • noarguingwithstupid

            200 year old fossilized ape!!

        • Susie Whats Her Name

          Also, Ms. Happywife, if you grew up with and are friends with Teresa, isn’t Joe your friend too? Why are you bashing your friend, Joe’s, wife?

          • Happywife

            I love Tre but Joe has put her through a lot. I try not to bash him too much but it’s hard. She’s in this legal mess because of Joe.

          • WestCoastFeed

            I think Susie means Teresa’s brother, Joe. Not Teresa’s husband, Joe. Or are you saying that Teresa’s brother caused her legal mess?

          • Happywife

            Thank you for clearing that up. Joe Gorga is a turncoat. He lets his wife dictate his relationship with his sister.

          • Susiehj

            I was asking you about Joe, her brother, whose wife you were bashing. Did you grow up with him also and is he your friend? Or just Teresa?

          • Marsbars09

            Happy, it’s been legally proven that Tre was much a part of the criminal activity as Joe.

        • noarguingwithstupid

          OMG You are delusional!!!

        • Marsbars09

          You’re sounding mighty negative Happy.

  • Birdie11

    Her bod looks strong and healthy, which I like…the implants, not so much. Joe looks like he takes steroids, and he is so short. Neither is my particular taste…but to each his own.

    • WestCoastFeed

      Joe has over-bulked for my taste. I prefer thinner men.

      • Birdie11

        Me too..and being 5’9”…taller too!!

    • Marsbars09

      I wonder if Joe is comfortable with all that muscle mass(?)

  • WestCoastFeed

    So far Mel has been doing the majority of promotional pieces. The new girls will probably get introduced in Bravo’s June 1 special and then we should be hearing more from them. Dina has done a bit and should be contributing more. But how about Teresa? Bravo will need to set up some PR situations where every word will be scripted in advance for her. Can’t risk anything spontaneous from her now.

  • Vince Foster, Jr.

    Really, who give a sh*t? US Weekly is a rag.

    • WestCoastFeed

      We just figure that Teresa probably cares.

    • Birdie11

      A hot bodies endorsement in any magazine is stupid.

      • Happywife

        Agreed. It’s also vane.

        • noarguingwithstupid

          I think you mean vain, not like a weather vane.

          • Birdie11

            LOL…I was so restraining myself!! A Tre weather vane might be attractive.

          • WestCoastFeed

            Yes, one with the rotating arms, that’s the way she gestures anyway.

          • Birdie11

            Yes!! Perfect with her giant fingers pointing the directions.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            And those ginormous man hands, which I confess, I am totally entranced by the size of the damned things!!!!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Perfect!!!! Flying around wildly tilting at wind in all directions with that wild mop flying everywhere!!!!

          • WestCoastFeed

            A whirligig. That’s the word I wanted.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Yes, Yes, a whirligig for sure!!!! A perfect word!!!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            It might be a good wind directional tool–her head, that is!!

          • twifan2

            😀
            Couldn’t help it either, cutie pie!
            http://i.imgur.com/HE5mnOb.gif

          • noarguingwithstupid

            He thinks it is a good idea also!!! What a cutie pie!!

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Maybe she did mean weather vane Naws! Considering Tre-ape already has a stick up her ass & the bird feather costume-dress. All we need now is for someone to mount her lying, cheating , stealing felon ass to the top of the barn & wait for the show!

            Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzztttt!

            http://realitytvgifs.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/tumblr_mb7z56vtyk1ql5yr7o1_400.gif?w=400&h=225&crop=1

            http://realitytvgifs.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/tumblr_mai58ygy6g1ql5yr7o1_400.gif?w=400&h=225&crop=1

          • noarguingwithstupid

            OMG A flying feathered Treape weather vane would be perfect and that dress is the ugliest on the planet. The poor emu’s who gave their life for that ugly pile of shit!!!

          • Happywife

            Yes, thank you.

    • WestCoastFeed

      Who buys the tabloids? People who like to look at pix of celebs? Read gossip about them?

      • Birdie11

        Pretty much…they do make good beach reading. (:

      • Marsbars09

        I’ve been purchasing them for years. The rags are fun to read.

  • SAMRA1116

    Melissa’s body looks healthy, not bone rail thin, but like everyone else, those two balls on her chest.

    • Birdie11

      Those two dumb balls define hot these days…*eye roll*

      • SAMRA1116

        I know n 96% of the women have those balls. lOL

        • Marsbars09

          Hi Samra! I don’t have them. 🙂

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Mine came direct from the factory. No after market boobies for me either Marsie!

          • Marsbars09

            LOL!

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            These 40 DD’s showed up over one summer vacation from Freshman to Sophomore year at age 15 & then the game was on! LOLOLOLOLOLOL!

          • Marsbars09

            Tiger you’re too much.

          • WestCoastFeed

            When I was a girl, way back in the dark ages before breast implants, it was Senior year Easter break who so many girls were in accidents and broke their noses. And were magically transformed.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            That is funny!!!!! Those noses just moved right on down the old chest cavity!!

          • Ah man…40 DD’s…whew!! I thought my 34 D’s were something but I don’t have nothing on you. WOWZERS!!

          • Marsbars09

            LOL! Tiger sounds genetically blessed

          • She’s lucky!!!!

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Aww, Thanks Doc. Sometimes they were a blessing & other times they & you were objects to be oggled, commented on & grabbed.& harassed. There’s a down side to everything. That’s probably where my smart mouth comes from. Shutting down unwanted propositions & lewd remarks walking around the City..

          • You’re truly a blessed woman all around….beauty, breasts and brains!! A triple threat…Hallelujah!

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Yup Mars. From genetics. No enhancements but a good, well fitting bra. My Great Grandmother, & my Grandmother were both very large breasted women. My oldest sister had it rough. The roughest. She started around age 10/12 & had 44DD’s at around age 13/14.

          • Marsbars09

            Your poor sister must have been privy to all kinds of harassment. :/

          • noarguingwithstupid

            They turn on you as you get older Doc!!! They are no longer your friends!!!

          • twifan2

            How so?

          • noarguingwithstupid

            They start heading to the floor!!!

          • twifan2

            Oh, they head south! ;D

          • WestCoastFeed

            Yep, the nips start looking at your toes.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Exactly correct!!

          • Birdie11

            OH LORD!! I’m late to this discussion!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Same thing here, Tiger!!!!

          • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

            Aww Naws my sister from the DBBTC – the ‘DAMN’! Big-Boobie Titty Committee. From genetics. No enhancements but a god , well fitting bra. My Great Grandmother, & my Grandmother were both very large breasted women. My oldest sister had it rough. The roughest. She started around age 10/12 & had 44DD’s at around age 13/14.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            It is in our family!!! They are not fun when you get old and they start heading south!!! Both my grandmothers were well endowed.

          • SAMRA1116

            I meant on TV or hollyweird. Sorry

          • Marsbars09

            OK.

  • WestCoastFeed

    Teresa has just posted Milania’s first communion dress portrait. She gives credit to Little Nikki’s so I think she got a nice discount.

    • Happywife

      Milania is a doll and the communion was done perfectly. Tre left no detail uncovered. Everything was perfect, food, music, venue.

      • noarguingwithstupid

        Glad you thought so. We know it means so much to you!!

        • Happywife

          I appreciate that.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            You are totally cray-cray!!

          • Marsbars09

            NAWS!!!

          • noarguingwithstupid

            She is!!!! She is a troll who visits here from time to time to get us all worked up!!! She is totally coo-coo for cocoa puffs!!

          • Marsbars09

            I just feel we have to be respectful of other posters’ opinions, especially if they’re visitors.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            She’s a troll, Mars!!!! You don’t have to be respectful of anyone, especially a TROLL!!!!

          • WestCoastFeed

            No, NAWS, she’s not a troll. Just someone dedicated to Teresa.

          • Marsbars09

            Thanks WCF.

          • twifan2

            She’s a delusional stan, WCF. 😉

          • WestCoastFeed

            That’s okay. Delusional stans should feel free to past here, too.

          • Marsbars09

            ITA.

          • twifan2

            Just don’t try & persuade me that Tre is ‘innocent’! 🙂
            Happy is too caught up in wanting TO BE Tre’s friend—sad. :/

        • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

          Wonder id all the people & businesses they stole from were able to give their kids a nice communion party too. Sponsored or not! Probably not considering the Giudices have yet to make any recompsation to all those they defrauded. Shameful, just shameful imo.

          • Marsbars09

            Great point Tiger. Do those businesses that cater to the Fraudices’ donate their services to the REAL needy & less fortunate?

          • WestCoastFeed

            Little Nikki’s does. They give the local parish communion dresses for the families who can’t afford to buy them.

          • Marsbars09

            Good to know.

          • Well that’s a high note in all of this mess.

          • Boom!!! Well said.

          • twifan2

            I’m wondering if the Holy water started to boil, the church shake when Tre & Juicy entered! ;D

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Lightning bolts and thunder, very, very frightening!!!

          • Bwahahaha!!! and crosses started flying all over the place.

          • Marsbars09

            You make it sound like the Exorcist.

          • twifan2

            AND cows! Oh My! 😀

            http://i.imgur.com/dRlVYza.gif

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Love the cows!!!!

          • twifan2

            Cows are sooo kool.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            During hurricane Charlie, the utility workers found a cow in a tree In Punta Gorda!!!

          • twifan2

            SEE! Cows can fly! 🙂

          • noarguingwithstupid

            And pigs too!!

          • Oh my!

      • Susiehj

        Did you attend?

        • Happywife

          Yes I did.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Oh, stop it!!! You are a lying crock of shit!!! Goodbye, troll!!

      • WestCoastFeed

        Where was it held, Happywife? Do you know who made the cake?

        • cutie pie

          happy just jumped onto google…she is a troll and does not know the ape…

          • noarguingwithstupid

            She’s a Friday troll!!!! This is her life, poor thing!!

          • cutie pie

            if happy actually knew tre and this was just her experience..fine…but she’s just yankin’ everyone’s chain…

          • twifan2

            OH! A Yankin’ Yank! 😀

          • uh huh….yup!!!

          • LMFAOOOO!!

          • WestCoastFeed

            Oh, we’ve spoiled her fun by asking too many questions.

          • cutie pie

            think so…if she was there, why not give us a blow by blow…answer a few questions….

          • twifan2

            Maybe her Search Engine is slow today? :/

          • noarguingwithstupid

            TWI!!!! How are youses??? The Friday troll is here to help us celebrate the week-end!!

          • twifan2

            I saw. She’s too funny with her stan self! 😀
            I’m doing ok. WORKING! 🙁
            How’s youses all today? The Pennster?

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Pennster is fine–Chats is fine also and hungry as always??

          • twifan2

            Chats is Chats! EVIL! 😀

          • Hi Cutie Patootie…have a great weekend, doll.

          • cutie pie

            you too doc..and to everyone else also

  • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

    Happy Friday ya’ll! Wishing everyone a happy & safe Memorial Day weekend! Enjoy!
    Please take some time to remember all those who have served!
    Thank you for all you have sacrificed!

    • Happywife

      Thank you for reminding everyone.

      • Marsbars09

        Hi Happy! How are you doing? I haven’t heard from you in a while.

        • Happywife

          Hello Marsbar09. I took a break from all blogs. The negativity becomes overwhelming after a while.

          • noarguingwithstupid

            You become overwhelming after a short short time!!

          • Hiiiiiii my lovely Naws. Are you staying in for the weekend (like me)?

          • noarguingwithstupid

            But of course!!! Just me and the pooch!! I’ll be checking in on you!!!

          • You better!!!

          • Marsbars09

            I know it’s hard to stand strong when people constantly trash you because your opinion is not the most popular. However, I commend you in “sticking to your guns”.

          • Hi Happy….enjoy your holiday weekend!

      • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

        You are welcome. Happy Memorial Day Happywife.

    • Marsbars09

      Hi Tiger! I wish you a wonderful Memorial Day Weekend as well.
      Cute pic of kitten with heart.

      • Tigerlily ✿❀❁

        Hi Mars Happy Friday! Hope you enjoy the upcoming weekend! Have fun. Be safe & enjoy! MWAH! xoxoxox

        • Marsbars09

          You too sweetie !

    • Awwww….the kitty is precious! Happy Friday T-Lilly & All.

      May everyone have a fun and safe Memorial weekend. God bless our vets!

      • Marsbars09

        You too Doc!

        • Hey Marsie!! Any plans this holiday weekend?

          • Marsbars09

            I’m going to my sister’s house for a BBQ. What about you?

          • Chile, not a damn thing…our grill fell apart and we have no plans. Can u send me some of that BBQ?

          • Marsbars09

            If there’s any left. My BIL is a great cook.

          • I’m salivating already!! DANG!!

          • Marsbars09

            You love to cook. I’m surprised you’re not cooking a little something something.

          • I want BBQ and our grill broke. My hubby is too cheap to buy a new one…I want char-grill food.

          • twifan2

            Use Tre’s method Doc! 🙂
            Works well for her.

            http://i.imgur.com/IefCPS1.jpg

          • noarguingwithstupid

            Look at the arms!!!! Hilarious photoshop!!!!

          • AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!! I showed my hubby this and he’s cracking up.

      • WestCoastFeed

        Memorial Day is to honor our service men and women who have died. Veteran’s Day is for the living vets.

        • Ooops, I meant what you stated. My error.

        • Marsbars09

          Thanks for clarifying WCF.

    • Vince Foster, Jr.

      Teresa and Joe served in the bank wars and the banks were injured.

      • cutie pie

        LOL

      • Ahahahaha! Teresa & Joe won that war!!

  • OMFG!!…..I’m watching the news and the news person said and I quote “strippers don’t put coochie on layaway….he wanted the the honey and she wanted the money” #dead